SB or SGF - how does the relationship start and what matters in determining that?
I am not sure how to handle what I'm looking for in an arrangement, because it varies depending on how I feel about a specific man. For context, I'm a 40-year-old white-collar SB who does quite well on Seeking. I am open to a traditional sugar relationship or a spoiled girlfriend dynamic, depending on the guy.
If I meet a man who is either married, 20-25 years older than me, or someone I wouldn't traditionally be attracted to, or I'm going to ask for an allowance or PPM, without exception. If we are not aligned, I don't negotiate.
However, if I am very attracted to a POT from Seeking and they're someone I could see myself in a long-term relationship with (and they are open to that as well), I'm much more open to considering a different dynamic. Finances and support still matter (dates, experiences, and overall generosity), but I don't need the clear terms of an arrangement. That said, I would feel slighted if I later learned that man had another SB he is (or was) supporting with a large allowance or PPM. Money is still always useful, and I don't want to feel like I'm a bargain.
How do other SB navigate this, and are there any SD perspectives on the above? I'm generally direct and transparent with people I have a strong connection with. Is it poor form to be upfront with someone about the differences? Will I screw myself in the long run? Should I expect to start as a traditional sugar relationship and let it evolve into something else?