I wrote a few weeks ago about my changing dynamic and thought it was worth it to write out what I have since learned and understand about my dynamic and give an update.
My daddy and I had many conversations since then about our dynamic and our needs as indivduals and together. He is a very dominant person in every day life taking care of what needs to be done, the people he cares for in his life, and of course me as his sub and boyfriend. Since talking about it I realized that it's a way that he needs me to take care of him. It's a different way than how I typically serve my role and purpose but I am devoted and it fulfills me very much to make him happy andfeel taken care of. He needs to have that weight lifted off of him and now that I understand his need I have no issues communicating more and exploring this with him.
I thought it was him trying to upend our relationship and I feel very silly for not realizing that it wasn't the case sooner, but after having these big conversations I feel immensely better. He was so elated that a partner was finally excited and willing to explore that side of him that he just didn't realize it was difficult for me to go outside of my comfort zone. I will admit that it is also on me because I didn't express myself as clearly as I should have before until that conversation happened.
Since then I've gotten my rules and chores back in order, punishments are regularly given again out because of my attitude problem, aftercare hasn't been skipped since, and we're balancing our needs better than ever. I love him very much and every day I'm excited to have my daddy because he loves me too.