u/Calm_Bridge6308

sup. incest victim just venting

idk if this is the older sister effect or what. i feel empty and horny. this sucks. i get tired of addressing the fact that i was molested for two years. but i can’t keep it bottled in either or i’ll just end up like beatrix kiddo. idk i need a gun

my mom never liked me, and that’s okay. there was nothing i could possibly do to stop her from letting me get molested. i was a child. i’ll probably keep this post up to remind myself. idk if i got molested as a baby by my dad or not, my grandma said i did. didn’t think about it until my mom twerked on my baby brother and said “it’s not like he understands what’s going on”. :((( she’s a nympho (she told me for some reason) and i remember her having sex when i came for court approved visitations. she barely talked to me, just let me roam free on the computer with no parental supervision lmao. i absolutely see why she didn’t get custody of me.

i liked the feeling of the molesting, but i think it’s just me being delusional so i can have some sort of control. i’m hyper sexual now, but when i can think straight i honestly don’t want a relationship. it would just be unfair to do to a person. i have a bunch of fucked up kinks. i can come up to 60+ times a hour, and i fucking hate it. i’m attractive, and it feels like a curse more than a blessing. corny, i know.

she’s said things to me like “well you’re supposed to fuck up with your first child” or one time she said to my brother as she was touching him “i know you won’t get raped or molested because you’re going to say no” so many things wrong with that sentence. i said no several times mom lmao but thanks for that side remark.

told me she was buying weed from the cousin that molested me lmao

she’s said it herself that’s she’s damaged and broken, but why have kids to repeat the cycle?

for some reason, she’s competitive with me. it makes talking to her tiring. she always wants to talk about herself or about men, or how to keep them and please them. when she found out i almost got a creepy sugar daddy, she just insulted me and his other (underage) victims! the way she was talking, it was like she wanted to fuck him herself. idk my mom seems like the type to fuck her kids boyfriends or friends for a ego boost. she walks around naked in from of all of us even though we don’t like it. i cannot believe i waited all this time just for my grandma to be right. she’s just a ditzy cunt :(. no amount of intelligence can make up for it. she’s a stupid fucking hacker and she watches me time to time. i cannot wait to learn cyber security to gain true freedom. i hate this btch, she thinks me talking about her letting me get molested for two years as “petty revenge” :((((( she just views me as a object for her sick desires and revenge

i absolutely see why i have slutty tendencies tho lmao

how does sex with someone with trauma feel? what’s the difference between having it dry versus wet? is there any foreplay? how do you date or hookup with men with a sexually traumatic past & fucked up kinks? i always feel like it’s a humiliation ritual to fuck a man nowadays. they seem greedy. or i’m usually scared he’s a pedo because of my stupid ass height.

yes these are stupid questions.

the sad donkey from winnie the pooh is back again haha

i guess i’m looking for someone to talk to when i post this stuff. not necessarily a fuck buddy or anything like that. just a horny person with a messed up childhood. maybe a little sexting cause i’m hyper sexual

i got molested for two years and that’s the only time i’ve been touched. they were family members & i feel ashamed for eventually going along with it and liking it. i feel like that’s what made them do anything to me. it sucks to realize that. i think that’s why my mom didn’t stop it

i’m afraid if i do date the person would be a pedo. the last time i tried to have sex with someone he was LMAO sigh. i cry randomly thinking about it, i feel very disturbed. my kinks are ddlg, age play, cnc, etc. so that’s not going to attract the best thing either lmao

idk what my mom is to me, always has sexual remarks about me. how i should keep myself tight, how much i would be worth, etc. tried to sell me off. if not that, she’s always making jealous remarks. got jealous when she found out i was almost trafficked. i don’t talk to her anymore but i still think about the stuff she’s said to me, i hate how it won’t go away. my dad is a recovering addict. so yeah i got lucky with the parent lottery :D

i’ve just been used and disregarded. makes me feel used and gross. i’ll be okay