u/Consistent-State1379

I hate that word but it's the best way to explain it.

I've always been somebody who is very sexually active, since I was about 15 (I'm just about to crack 30) and I've been with the same woman for 9 years.

I am insanely attracted to her so it's not so much that but we have a very dead bedroom, I'm talking once maybe 3 times every 3 months. A lot of this is down to likely her ADHD and just not having an interest and yeah it hurts but it's whatever. I have a business, hobbies, and hands, I'm fine.

But when we do, I just have no confidence at all. I am unsure of myself, I don't know what to do, I seem to press every wrong button these days. Quite often too I finish quickly and honestly this is the bit that gets me because I have NEVER had this problem.

I'm not overweight by any means, I have your typical WASP rugby player build and there's a small belly there sure, I'm a middle aged Dad, I don't think it's a problem, I'm still fit.

But yeah, I just feel like I'm floundering like a bloody 15 year old and it's murdering my self confidence.

For those wondering, yes we have tried to fix the libido mismatch, it won't ever change.