Hi!, i know y'all must be tired from this kind of posts, but i want to get all of this out my head, and heart...
Before the whole rant, i want to tell a couple things:
- I'm from Medellín, Colombia. Colombia is not the most kink-positive country, but not as bad as others, from my point of view, is more traditional than anything.
- I do get that interacting in kink communities is inherently different from interacting in "normal" spaces, yet, that does not excuse some of the behaviors I've seen
With all of that out of the way. Why is it so hard to get a couple in the ABDL community?. At least from the Cis (?) Het Male experience. And i mean in both the Romantic and Sexual sense; someone to enjoy both the ABDL lifestyle, and things outside the community.
I've tried a bunch of the usual dating tips from the community:
- Fetlife: From what I've explored, the Colombian community there is almost non-existent, meaning: no munches, no events, nada.
- Munches: From the interactions I've had in what passes as a community here (loose instagram accounts and facebook groups) there has only been one in recent years; and that is not in my city, it is in the whole country, there was a single ABDL munch in bogota, and that is that.
- r/ABDLPersonals: I posted there once, and while i had some promising interactions with the single guy that answered to the ad, due to some IRL stuff i couldn't do anything further, and, again, I'm speaking from the Cis-Het Male Experience, and while it is nice to get a friend within the local community, I'm not looking for a male partner..
And circling back to the Instagram comment, a lot of the interactions I've had there have been awful. For example: Minutes after making a story about a purchase from a local ABDL reseller (best discrete way of getting ABDL gear here IMO), there was a guy asking if i was wearing those diapers, if i had "Filled them up a lot" and asking for pics of my supposedly wet diaper. And, as i think anyone would, felt a bit creeped out; and that has been the case of a lot of the interactions I've had within the local community.
But, from the things I've stated above, the perception I've gotten is that a lot of people (not everyone, mind you), is only interested about talking about the ABDL side of things. Also, the sheer skewness of the roles within the community baffles me!, a lot of people are little, and are hoping, ideally, for a CG, be it a mommy or a daddy or a parent; way fewer are CGs themselves, and either already have an SO to take care and love, or are absolutely desperate for said little, to the point (like the experience I've exposed in the last paragraph); and finally there are even fewer (again, from my perspective) switches, like me.
And I'm proud of being a switch, i love being in littlespace, without a single care in the world, and I would love taking care of someone, making them feel like the most beautiful thing in the world, and allowing them to feel the same carelessness of littlespace i so love.
I love wearing diapers (and using them); I love pacifiers, bottles, rattles, and every other piece of baby gear anyone could think; I love onesies, shortalls, plastic pants, or any other ABDL piece of clothing; and, like some, I do like some bondage in the mix, to drive the whole role in. But i also love playing the guitar, listening and playing to old rock and blues tunes and hear the music just fade in the air; I love videogames, and i can nerd hours on end about things like Gregtech, just because; I love cars, and the engineering they bring, driving them fast, slow, in a hurry, or just vibin';I love reading, cheesy fantasy or romance novel; Horror; mystery, and many more things.
Some may say that 'nothing you said is necessarily exclusive from each other', but, at times, it should be. One thing cannot encompass the whole of a being, just a part of it, and, at times ,they must separate for said being to function.
In anyway, thanks to anyone who took the time to read this not-so-short, rant, whether you agree or disagree with me.