One look into my profile and you would a peek into the delicious deviance of my mind. There’s lots of prompts, each describing with lewd need an intoxicating scenario where I am taken, dismantled and trained, with my rights snatched and my humiliation making the central theme. It is the most honest reflection of what I crave, and if I were to write a memoir, I would love to debase myself by adding those, so the world knows me for the pathetic slut that I am.
I am not new to this. I have been in dynamics. I have played the role of a slave to utmost perfection, controlled by cords and collars that run online. I have submitted to people that I don’t know the identity of, and I have left myself to the mercy of absolute strangers.
I am fairly certain of what I want and enjoy. I want to submit. I want to feel the strings of control around every limb, every body part, such that I have to ask for permission before eating, sitting, talking, breathing.
I am a college student. I share a dorm with two other girls but currently I am home, and will be home for a while. Even when I am in college, it is conveniently easy for me to carry out any and all instructions in washroom stalls or when my room is empty. I am studious, I am smart and fashionable. I am a huge, huge exhibitionist. I feel incomplete unless I am in pain or being denied, or being humiliated. I enjoy being controlled and being reminded of the chokehold that someone has over me.
I have just come out of a relationship, and a fairly vanilla one. I want some sadistic to take over and show me my place. Someone intense and demanding, someone who hovers. Someone who haunts. You have to be everything that I am not- disciplined, orderly, systematic, and the total opposite of lenient. String me up and strip down all of the glamour to reveal the pathtic slut that I am.
Give me rules. Give me tasks. Control every part of my life and worse. Be smart and intelligent- I am sharp as a whip and rude as fuck- especially if I think you would take a minute to get the insult, let alone punish me for it and teach me respect. If you give me chants or mantras you would be ghosted. If you demand pics before we really connect, I will ghost you. I don’t do calls or video calls. I will never show you my face or tell you my real name or where I am from, but everything else, I’ll surrender to you. If you can take it.