Mental aspects of submission.
I am having a hard time finding what I am looking for, but to be fair, I am having a hard time articulating it. Maybe its because I am still new to learning and understanding dynamics, but even chatting with 'Doms' (yes, air quotes because most have less knowledge than I), I find they do not seem to understand either.
I would be glad to try and explain in more depth with someone who is knowledgeable on the mental aspects of a dynamic, or have a general discussion of what it is I am really looking for.
For now, I can say I want to feel as if I am learning and growing. Understanding myself and the dynamic so that I can find my place within it. I want to understand how to find the quiet, the peace, that is often talked about. I want to find the person who understands the mental needs and can help guide me through that channel.
Does any of that make sense? Am I chasing a white whale?