So, my favorite topic again - the masks that we wear, and how tired of them we actually are. Care to join?
I think some people are almost unable to be truly honest about themselves to others around them. We have a reputation and an image to uphold - carefully crafted over the years, molded to the liking of the people close to us. Polite, nice, understanding, helpful, deeply empathic, and surely with a great sense of humor. I wonder where that last piece can come from?
What this behavior brings is simple - safety. The presumption that if we do X and appear to be Y - the people around will tolerate us. Accept into their circle, validate that we are "normal".
And so - the mask is up, and everything is nice and pleasant.
There is, however, a small issue. We are not what that mask shows to the world. At times - quite not that.
The common result of this issue is simple - loneliness and boredom. The feeling of being a fraud. The ever-present fear that someone will "find out" what we actually are. And, the biggest one - that they will be absolutely disgusted once they find out, and the mask that we so thoroughly crafted for them will no longer work.
And so - the inability to be real with people that know "you", and the crushing loneliness and tiredness of needing to calculate the result, impact and risk of each word, sound and face expression that you do. Before you say or make them.
If none of this sounds familiar to you - well, I am absolutely sure that you should stop here, dear reader. You are probably doing well and OK, and thus this ad is not really for you.
If you are, however, still here and reading - I guess you know what I am talking about. But why? "Where is the sexy stuff?", you may say, and "Why you just repeat the things that I try NOT to think about?".
You see, I've always considered that the only place where people like us can...attempt to be real is with total strangers. Far away from work, family, partners, friends - all those for which we have our special kind of hand-tailored masks suiting their expectations.
The only thing better than total strangers, who may never meet you again your life and therefore pose very little risk to you - is if you are also anonymous. Not seen, able to limit what you share. Hide behind the fancy words, perhaps?
And...well, DPP looks quite like it. Not ideal, but very little places are, if ever.
I may have lost my train of thought somewhere above, but it is quite difficult to carefully formulate a good bait for someone as cautious and similar to me. But if you are still here - I guess it might have worked. Did you check that no one sees that you are reading this?
The premise that I offer is simple - I like to study people. I do absolutely abhor the lies and pleasant truths, and I want to see someone true self, stripped from their masks and the ways they hide. Horrible and beautiful in what they actually are underneath all that.
What do I offer?
I can offer you a position of a subject of this study. I ask the questions, and you give me 100% unpolished truth. You get off on doing the unbelievable and telling about your real self, thoughts and needs. I get off on learning that, and seeing how you unravel. Options may apply.
If that sounds like something you want to try - do let me know. Who knows, maybe we can be of use for each other.
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Hi. Whatever that was above, I did feel like saying it to lay down some groundwork. You can't really make true connections until you make yourself a bit vulnerable. Now the goal of this specific ad is to make YOU vulnerbale. How often do you allow yourself to be that?
I don't think this would be a surprise by this point, but this is more of "seeking a conversation", rather than "seeking an RP".
I am posting my usual kinklist / limits below for those who won't bother checking my previous posts, but in this case it is more for "general awareness of what I am interested in", not specifically a mandatory suggestion of what we should talk about. Just, you know, this is, roughly, what I am.
I would be curious to know about what you are.
Me:
- For my kinks: slavery, domination, free-use, humiliation, degradation, rape and rape-like CNC, sadism, torture, endurance training, orgasm control and denial, and tools to enforce them. Basically whichever way I can fuck with somebody's mind and body and make them do, become or endure whatever I want them. I am mostly interested in "why" and "what", rather than "how", so I would say the majority of this would be mind-play and situation / thoughts description rather than purely steamy smut. Sex is fun and all that, but it is not the thing that really interests me, it is but a tool.
- For my limits: hard - CP / underage, necro, copro; soft - zoophilia, unreasonable amounts of violence / gore (i.e. up to death). I can be more flexible on some of soft ones of these, if it is needed and gives a better result for the discussion / story dynamics, but we would need to agree first. Anything else should generally be OK.
- For this specific ad - I guess only CP is a limit, that's some demons that you probably need to work on by yourself.
For you - my only requirements that you are female and 18+ (i.e. you at least generally know what a floppy disk is, or heard an elder talk about it), but I would normally prefer if you are 25+. A certain degree of experience in your life, let's say, mental foremost. A person usually needs some time to mature and be sufficiently fucked-up. Open-minded, and with unsatisfied creative fire inside you. And I do, absolutely, love smart women (no DD/LG stuff for me).
For logistics - I am on UTC+2 (Eastern Europe). For communication channel - well, we no longer have Reddit PM (which is an abhorring injustice), so Reddit Chat it is. Something like Discord is an option (due to my perfectionism and I hate that you cannot post-edit and proofread Reddit PMs), but only if and after we hit it off here first (see Occam's razor). I am mostly active here during the business week days, so on weekends my replies will be more rare / shorter (you can presume why). I am quite swamped lately, so can't promise daily replies.
I have a job and standard adult responsibilities (and you too probably), so I imagine this would be a slow burner, to talk, play and exchange interesting ideas when we can. Due to the above (and how my mind works) I typically write at least several paragraphs, and thus I usually won't be able to support short & frequent messages in chat-type exchange (but, hell, this time I can try to).
Since I am sane enough to understand how little replies M4F threads get here - if you find this much later, this is most probably still open for play. Beggars can't be choosers, right?