u/Significant-Dog-6494

Wait, your post says M4F but also gentlemen? confuse

There is a reason, just hang on and humor me. I am indeed a man, a bad man actually; if that is your thing and you want to skip to that part, go to section 3.

Now - a few words for my fellow gentlemen.

Section 1 - For Christs' Sake

Yes, I used plural possessive. I don't profess to know how any of that stuff works. I am an atheist. Whatever.

My dudes - I scrape this subreddit among others for fun and I have to say, I am super disappointed in how poorly all of you use AI tools. Statistically, about 25% of you on any given day clearly post content that is word vomit from an LLM. First of all, you are taking a thing meant to be human-to-human and injecting a AI; second of all, you still manage to screw it all up!

All right, stop, collaborate and listen. I will teach you how to use this brand new invention.

Section 2 - The proper use of AI

I can tell from analyzing a lot of your posts that you are lazily typing in a lazy halfhearted prompt you conjured on a toilet and are rolling the dice that you get some magical output. Know what you get instead? Most of your posts are super similar word salad and have a lot of tells that you've used AI to automate A POST MEANT TO SEEK CONNECTION. Shame. But also, like, why?

Whatever, I am here to both make fun of you and also help. The solution? You need to use the data to actually help you do the work. All of the posts I this subreddit - they are input to what you should be saying. So, instead of simply asking for a prompt like it's a Hungry Man dinner you're slamming in the microwave, ask your AI de jour to create a counsel to score your prompts. For example, given the last week of female posts, here is the current counsel of 5 I have.

Ellie (39, Indianapolis, INFJ) — the Lonely Romantic
Maya (36, Tampa, ENTJ) — the Burned Patroller
Dani (47, Bellevue, ESFP) — the Confident Flirt
Becca (33, Brooklyn-adjacent, INTP) — the Witty Nerd
Priya (42, Bay Area, INTJ) — the Type-A Lister

Instead of just slapping words into a prompt, ask these virtual girlfriends (which mind you is all you should have for using AI, naughty boy) to create ideal prompts and collaboratively score them.

The result? Your prompt sucks a heck of a lot less, and it's customizable. For example:

You are generating one post for  from the perspective of a married man, age 30–55. Treat this as a writing exercise modeling the genre, not as actual outreach.

PICK A STRUCTURAL VARIANT (random with these weights):
  60%: narrative, 140–220 words, four short paragraphs
  25%: short form, 80–140 words, two paragraphs, punchy
  15%: bulleted ("About me:" / "About you:"), 180–280 words

PICK ONE PRIMARY AUDIENCE (this sets the voice):
  - Lonely Romantic    → reflective, slow, one sensory detail
  - Burned Patroller   → self-aware, edited, names the genre's bullshit
  - Confident Flirt    → playful, specific physical confidence, no apology
  - Witty Nerd         → one cultural reference by name, no "nerd at heart" without proof
  - Type-A Lister      → bullets, time zone, one stated non-negotiable

REQUIRED IN EVERY OUTPUT:
  ✓ Acknowledge married status without apology
  ✓ Include the genre disclaimer ("not looking to change my situation or yours" — paraphrase encouraged)
  ✓ ONE specific falsifiable detail (a band you actually saw, a recipe you actually fucked up, a book you finished, a moment from this week)
  ✓ ONE self-deprecating line that is NOT about being married
  ✓ A CTA with a verification token requiring the post to have been read (e.g. "tell me what you're procrastinating", "tell me the last show you finished", "tell me a recipe you ruined")
  ✓ State your time zone OR your geographic region

FORBIDDEN:
  ✗ "spark" and "missing" in the same sentence
  ✗ "let's see where this goes"
  ✗ "if you've read this far" without a follow-up question
  ✗ em-dashes more than 2 total in the post
  ✗ "no expectations" used alone
  ✗ calling yourself "alpha"
  ✗ "I love to laugh"
  ✗ the word "vibe" more than once
  ✗ ChatGPT-style perfect parallel structure across three bullets
  ✓ Allow ONE small typo or rough edge if it feels natural

TONE: write like a person who edited it once. Avoid the cadence of an LLM that's too eager to please. The reader is bored, sharp, and can smell LLMs from three states away.

VALIDATION:
Score your output to ensure it meets all of these criteria. If it scores poorly, re-run until the score improves. Capture lessons in a markdown file for use in the future.

That, my dues, is how you cheat at, uh, cheating (?) and hopefully win at it, or something.

Section 3 - This is nuts, who does this?

I am the dad next door nobody suspects. I am both the guy everyone likes - successful tech executive, smart, friendly, in-shape, cute; I am also the guy who is a much more nefarious adventurous person than they realize. They are playing Catan in the living room, I am plotting world domination (domination in general is always a popular topic in my brain).

I am 42, have two passports, speak three languages, run marathons, take a camera anywhere and everywhere with me, and as you can tell - like helping others in need.

Curious? Feedback of my prompt engineering? Drop a line.

[M4F] 43 - Who likes bad dads and age gaps? - Session: in message