u/Upstairs_Screen_9911

I’m in a weird spot. My (32M) GF (30F) and I recently got back together after a very heavy ending before. I’ll keep it brief as possible but basically. For the 3 years we were together it was solid, about 2 years in I told her about my kink. How I really like sharing my gf, and she was not really open to it at all. We continued talking about it, had a lot of dirty talk around it. Up until she cheated on me. I found out by going through her phone especially hurtful because all I asked for videos and it wouldn’t have been cheated based on what we had communicated at the time.

In spite of that, I was able to quickly sexualize the whole situation and demanded that she go see this dude again and get videos make it right and we can go from there. Fast-forward a few weeks later I’m so struggling with everything. Meanwhile, I’m now sharing her with two others now. And she’s not being very considerate so after two months of fumbling through it, we decided to break up and I move out as soon as I’m able to which ends up being another 3-4 months.

Move out, she doesn’t want stop talking she misses me not really hearing it. We stopped talking for roughly 6 months and then I get a drunken phone call one night…… and it’s her…. and I pick up… and you can imagine how the rest goes. So over the course of the next 12 months be talking she’s making her case around house. She’s just happy to be talking with me and then it progresses to well do you have to talk other girls, which progresses to I wanna be your girlfriend.

Which brings you to today… now that she is my girlfriend she does not want to participate in any sharing anymore. It is kind of frustrating because of all the false promises she’s made around the subject. I’m really skeptical of continuing the relationship in a monogamous capacity because it feels like trying the exact same thing over again and that shit had me in shambles after finding out she cheated, so the sharing is almost like a stop gap for her to not feel driven to cheat, but now she doesn’t want that and it’s making me reconsider if I wanna be with her.

I do enjoy spending time with her. I think she’s great but that cheating has never left me and I also really don’t like that. She’s acting opposed to the sharing now looking for any perspective on this? Ultimately, I do feel like sharing is something that I want to do with a partner in any of my relationships moving forward so the fact that she’s so offboard is more than concerning

Full disclaimer, my girl 26 has cucked me with 2 different guys in the past. One she stopped seeing, and the other was a close friend. I only allowed to my friend to fuck her because I found out during my gf and I’s relationship that they had a past before we were together. Everything was good on that front until, I found out that he actually tried to get my gf to cheat at one point before we opened the door to all this. My gf ended up telling me later on.

We took a break for a bit but now we’re starting to talk about bringing in another friend of mine. They haven’t had a history at all, and he checks a lot boxes for us. I like it because I feel like there’s far more accountability with a friend versus a stranger on the internet. Don’t to worry about boundaries being crossed as much. Has anyone been in the situation before? Any pro tips? I hear people say don’t use friends but it worked out well for me this first go around. Thoughts?