I’ve posted faceless nsfw pics on subs out of loneliness rather than genuine desire to sext, and sometimes I get the urge to do it again
I’m a woman in my thirties. I’m pretty successful career-wise, but in my personal life, I’m very lonely and just feel kind of stuck in terms of figuring out how to fix that. Much of my family died young (from cancer and such, not because I come from a family of drug addicts or anything like that). I’ve never been good at making a lot of friends, and the ones I do have, have their own families that understandably take priority over me, leading to a lot of cancelled plans. I’m also really insecure about my body and how people will react to it irl.
A few years ago, I learned that there is one fool proof way of getting connection and validation, and it’s posting pictures of my naked body on nsfw subreddits (they’ve all been deleted, you won’t find them on my account lol). I’m aware it’s not real connection and won’t ever amount to anything beyond faceless sexual messaging, and I ultimately wind up thinking about that and crying lol, but I guess it’s better than nothing at least for a little while when I’m spending another long weekend by myself.
Most of the guys just want to exchange sexual texts, but every once in a while, one will go beyond that and talk to me like more than body parts, and that’s the part that results in me inevitably returning to do it again a couple of weeks/months later. I recently looked up the last guy I had a somewhat long term whatever you call that type of arrangement with before I finally told him that I emotionally couldn’t keep doing whatever we were doing and deleted my account. Now I’m all in my feelings wanting to reach out and say I miss talking to him, while knowing logically that he’s been talking to god only knows how many other random horny people since I stopped talking to him like 10 months ago. Shit’s wild.