u/AtlantaJD

You show up for the interview and I direct you to the couch. I ask you a few benign questions. And then they become a little more personal.

I ask how far you are willing to go to prove that you are serious. You hesitate, not because you are offended, but because you understand the game has changed. You look down at the couch, then back at me, trying to decide whether this is still an interview, an audition, or a test of confidence.

“I said I’d do anything within reason,” you say carefully.

I smile. “Then let’s find out where reason ends.”

The room goes quiet again. You know you can stop this at any time. You know you can stand up and leave. But you also know you want the role badly and part of you is curious how much control you can keep while pretending to give some of it away.

So you lean back slightly, meet my eyes, and wait for the next question.

What happens next and when are you available to meet me to enjoy this roleplay?

Do any females want to hang out at the Pink Pony tonight? Drinks and lap dances are on me. Let's have some fun!

I know a gentleman usually opens with “hello,” but Reddit rewards specificity.

About me: professional, clean, sane, occasionally funny, indoorsy, soft hands, and better in person than in a Reddit subject line. I just want to pair butthole jokes with butthole pokes.

About you: lurking, reliable, curious, indecent intentions.

Important clarification because Reddit is Reddit: this is genuinely M4F, not a clandestine M4M post where you can "convince" me.

You took the time to log into Reddit, follow this community, and click on this link. It's Friday and you have needs. Send me a message and let's turn your scrolling into moaning as you cum on my face.

Look, the calendar gods only do this for us once every several years and it feels deeply irresponsible to let the holiest of overlapping holidays pass without proper observance. So here's my pitch: you lie back, I get on my knees, and I treat you to the kind of unhurried, leave-the-jaw-sore, lose-track-of-time pussy eating that makes Tuesday feel like a federal holiday. This is a one-way fiesta and you're the guest of honor.

I'm clean, respectful, and I take my civic duties seriously. Let's make this Cinco de Mayo something you'll think about every May 5th from now until you're old. Olé, etc.

Look, the calendar gods only do this for us once every several years and it feels deeply irresponsible to let the holiest of overlapping holidays pass without proper observance. So here's my pitch: you lie back, I get on my knees, and I treat you to the kind of unhurried, leave-the-jaw-sore, lose-track-of-time pussy eating that makes Tuesday feel like a federal holiday. This is a one-way fiesta and you're the guest of honor.

I'm clean, respectful, and I take my civic duties seriously. Let's make this Cinco de Mayo something you'll think about every May 5th from now until you're old. Olé, etc.