I used to do a gram or two every weekend. It was absolutely terrible for my health and life. Got relatively clean, as in I will only do it every 1-2 month. But the itch hasn’t gone away - so I found myself lately trading options during the day.
I have one of those white collar jobs where sometimes it’s busy and sometimes it isn’, and when it isn’, I will trade option. It tickles my brain the same way cocaine does - huge dopamine boosts. Now I haven’t lost any money doing it, in fact I am up a couple grand - but I know damn well that couple bad moves and I can be down 5-10k easily.
I am talking to my family doctor in couple of weeks, hoping she can get my some psychiatrist to work through how my brain is always looking for that dopamine rush. Just so addicted to excitement and uncertainty.