How I realised I was smaller
This is a repost (from my old account), but some folks have asked me to share again. Enjoy.
During my first year of uni (age 18), I stayed in halls of residence and shared a room with another guy. Our flat was made up of 3 twin rooms and 4 single rooms with shared bathroom and lounge/kitchen. You have to realise at this point, I was a very skinny, tall, nerdy, geek, studying business. Never had a girlfriend and was 100% virgin. Yes I jerked off and watched porn but had really only ever kissed a girl a couple of times and no further than that. My roommate and actually all but one of my housemates were studying sport and fitness. They were the embodiment of all the bullies I’d had at my school, and also the image of a ‘man’ that I so desperately wanted to be like. They were all good looking and muscled in all the right places, looked good in whatever they wore and definitely a hit with the ladies.
My room mate and I didn’t socialise much and kept to ourselves. I was pretty shy around him and I’d change in the showers or when he wasn’t in the room. I didn’t like having my top off much anyway. He wasn’t as shy and didn’t wear a shirt most of the time in our room but he’d always have a towel around him putting on his underwear.
As the weeks went on my room mate used to bring girls to the house. He used to talk to me about how they’d fucked and couldn’t wait to get laid next. To be fair to him he never brought a girl back to our room as far as I knew and there was a mutual respect between us and we kept to ourselves. However, we didn’t have much in common and when he’d been out drinking with his mates he was different. Often he would come back to the room drunk and noisy when I was either still at my computer working or trying to sleep. It pissed me off and any time I said anything to him about it he’d say something like “just live a bit more man” or “it’s not my fault I’m noisy”. I always wanted to get one up on him, but usually chickened out on being too loud in the morning when he had a hangover or disturbing him while he was working.
One night I could hear him and his mates come back really late from a night out, like 3am. I have no idea why I thought to do this but I decided to prank him when came back in to our room. I’d never done anything like this before in my life. He opened the door and blundered around the room a bit, turning on his bedside light trying to plug in his phone to charge etc. I was pretending to be asleep, but kept my eyes open just a bit so I could see what was going on. When he was getting changed I rolled over still pretending to be asleep and made the covers come off me. I’d pulled my shorts down so he had a complete view of my dick balls and everything.
I swear I heard him laugh when he turned round and saw me he said something like “Woa! fuck dude now I know why you’re so fucking shy about changing in front of me”, but he just pulled the covers over me, finished changing and went to bed.
I have no idea what I was expecting him to do or say or why I chose to expose myself to him. Maybe thinking cause he was such a jock he’d be grossed out by seeing another guys dick. Who knows! But for some reason I got a massive thrill out of it. I lay awake (still pretending to be asleep) for ages and got really horny. I really wanted to knock one out but couldn’t for risk of him still being awake. In the morning he never said anything.
Over the next few days and weeks it turned me on so much thinking about him seeing my dick that I pulled the stunt a few times more. For some reason I was desperate to try and engage him in conversation about it too but couldn’t ever bring it up as he would have known I was only pretending to be asleep. I tried to raise conversations about it by saying how hot our room was over night but he never took the bait.
I tried to up the stakes and get him to say something by shaving all of my pubes off. I didn’t know back then that most guys were probably doing it as well even outside of porn, but it seemed like the only thing I could do to get his attention. I didn’t have a chance to expose myself again to him for a couple of weeks so kept having to keep my pubes shaved. Eventually I managed to find an opportunity as he’d gone out with his mates again and they weren’t back before midnight so I setup the prank again. This time I was braver and when I heard them get back to the house I pulled my shorts down and threw the covers off so I was exposed as he opened the door. My bed was right opposite the door so the light coming in from the corridor would have lit me from where he stood.
My heart was pounding as I heard him outside our room and he turned the key in the lock. As he opened the door I could see his silhouette and the light illuminated my shaved dick and balls. He just paused and stood there looking at me. It felt like an hour but was probably only a few seconds. What happened next I had never imagined, but I was stuck or he would know I was faking it. He turned and whispered down the corridor. “Guys, he’s done it again while he’s asleep! Come and see!”
At this point time seemed to freeze. I had never imagined that he’d talk to anyone else about seeing my dick, and I’d never contemplated that he’d get others to come and see too. But I was stuck. Even if I wanted to move I don’t think I could have. I wanted to ask him what he’d told them but I was still ‘asleep’ so couldn’t do anything.
I couldn’t really see who the others were as the light was behind them but there were about 5 of them. As they walked closer I closed my eyes fully so they couldn’t see I was still awake but could still hear what they were saying just about.
You need to realise that I didn’t really know I had a small dick at this point. Yeah I know I didn’t compare to porn stars, but I just sort of assumed I was average, I’d never seen another guys dick in real life and no one had seen my since I was a child.
This all changed when I heard one of the guys, who I think was one of my housemates, walk over towards me and say “Jesus dude, you weren’t kidding, he has got a tiny dick!” Followed by someone else saying “yeah that kid can’t be more than 2 inches” and then another “I bet he shaved his pubes to make it look bigger” and then the first guy firing back “that’s the only reason you’ve got a razor, there’s no hair on your chin to shave!”. “Shutup Dave (it was my housemate) I’m bigger than he is, and you know I’m a grower, I’m smaller than you soft, but I’ve got a good inch on you when you’re hard!”
My head was trying to process all of what I’d just heard, did they really think my dick was tiny, was 2” not very big, it was bigger when I was hard and surely that’s what counts, had they all seen each other hard…
Then my roommate said “leave him alone, he’s probably a grower too like you Luke, he could have us all beat when he’s hard. I’ve only ever seen it like this, just cover him up and let’s get out of here. Forget that I ever told you about his dick”
Someone else replied whose voice I didn’t recognise said “no way he’s getting to be bigger than your 8 inches from that tiny thing. I bet he’s no more that 5” hard!”
“You’re on, I’ll take that bet. I bet it gets to six” to which he replied, “seriously, you're going to bet on that tiny little thing being 3 times the size hard, ok deal. What’s your wager!?”
“£50 he’s no bigger than mine when I’m soft!”
At this point all I could think about was how I could pretend to wake up and make it all stop. This wasn’t what I had planned and now they were betting on how big or rather small my hard dick was. I had no idea what to do or how to react as if I’d been asleep, so it was probably better that I just stayed pretending to be asleep. My heart was racing, and I just wanted to die. I pretended to roll from my side on to my back and pulled the covers over my dick.
At this point my room mate chipped in and said “looks he’s covered up now so you’re never going to know. Just call it a night and let’s go to bed”
Part of me felt a new connection with him as he was trying to stand up for and protect me. They all left the room and I thought that was the end of it, I pulled up my shorts and went to sleep. I wasn’t aware of when my roommate went to bed as I must have been asleep.
In the morning I made sure I was up and out before any of the others as I didn’t want to face any of them.
Over the next few days I came to the realisation that I didn’t have an average sized dick and it was pretty tiny but somehow that also turned me on and despite being straight I wanted to see what my housemates had in their shorts and who it was who was 8”.
It was also making me horny that some of my flatmates and some other guys had seen my shaved dick and I didn’t even know who they were.
They def told other people around Uni too cause I could see people pointing and whispering sometimes. It was very embarrassing knowing that everyone knew I had a small dick, but also a real turn on, particularly my house mates. Especially as they didn’t know I knew that they knew, if that makes sense.
They’d make small dick jokes around me, and talk about how they fucked their girls and made them beg to stop cause their dicks were hurting them too much.
I didn’t know it then but it was the start of my sph kink.