u/Icy-Efficiency2619

What exactly would you change and how so?

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My (M27) gf (F26) and I are sexually attracted to each other, but her faith is the most important thing to her so she doesn't want to have sex before marriage. I am not religious (though she's trying her hardest to change that and I have been open to exploring...) and do not have any hesitancies about sex aside from avoiding a pregnancy. The trouble lies that we have had sex a number of times and each time it is mostly enjoyable but then when I orgasm, even though I wear a condom and pull out before actually ejaculating, she has a panic/shame/guilt attack in the moment and a mild on edge vibe until she gets her next period. This has happened now maybe 4 times over the last year. I know this is going to happen and try to avoid sex and the meltdown, but she often is initiating the sex on the pretense of just getting a little handsy. I inevitably give in because I actually very much want sex but then have to deal with being the enabler. If I do resist successfully then she is also unhappy because she feels like I am not interested in her. It's a mess.

Bottom line is I am a patient person who is trying hard to make things work, but I am also a very sexual person that wants sex at least once a week and I am getting intimacy maybe once every few months. I am at the point where I am tempted to seek out sex elsewhere because I am not getting satisfied and I don't really want to have sex and immediately have to console and apologize for what I just did. I know cheating will be exciting but it is bad and will only result in pain for us both.

There are other issues that divide us as well. Faith has a hand in it for sure. Our personalities and hobbies have a lot that lines up but also a hell of a lot that is at odds. I love her at the end of the day and want her to be happy but I don't know how much of my desires or even happiness I should put aside just to make things work with her.

Thoughts?

Alternatively, should short guys or guys with small dicks be screened out? Naturally there is more to consider than these traits in reality.

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All penises can be celebrated, but should all penises be appreciated....

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