u/Ok_Jump9568

when my ocd peaked and i was convinced i was either dying or going blind every second of the day its like a constant panic attack i didnt sleep for a whole week and went through sleep deprivation pyschosis. Before this i had taken drugs rarely never thought about them until severe chronic ocd latched on me. Even after i got over this ocd theme another came. It feels like you enter a different reality where your worst fears are true and you know they are irrational but cant shake it from the millsecond you wake up.im not a moron but things like this push you to the edge i was debating damaging my brain or taking salvia so i would either actually end it or find a fix. It isnt fair i have to pay with my life for a moments peace. Denying drugs in this situation is like giving a blind man vision for the first time and taking it away or giving any disable person a normal body temporarily. to any human in this place thats iressistible. Ive had many mental illnesses but OCD is by far the worst. Its stupid how its talked about like in so ocd i clean my room. Id knock someone out if i heard them say that. Its made me bedbound for months and im a guy that can usually take a lot of pain. Its ruined my life. Anyway thats my 2 scents