u/Puzzleheaded_Job7292

From everyone else’s perspective, you’ve made it.

A partner. A healthy relationship—or at least what everyone assumes is one. The house, the car, maybe some kids. A life full of things you once hoped you’d have.

They don’t know you can sit in a house full of the people you’re closest to, the people you love more than anyone in the world, and somehow be the loneliest you’ve ever been.

That loneliness puts a dull cloud over blessings you know other people pray for.

You finally share a genuine laugh with your partner. For a second, it feels normal again. Then an intrusive thought about what they did shatters the moment.

Was it the first time? Where did it happen? Was it in the family SUV? The couch in the sitting room?

Those thoughts cut deep. But somehow the lies hurt worse.
You put everything into someone who could smile at you, kiss you, say “I love you,” and still keep something from you that could risk the entire life you built together.

They’ve apologized. You’ve forgiven—or you’re trying to. Yet somehow you’re both still suffering.

If staying can hurt this much, why is leaving so damn hard?
I don’t want revenge. I’m not looking to hurt anyone back. Honestly, the thought of being with somebody else doesn’t necessarily excite me.

But the loneliness is heavy.

And sometimes I wonder about those little things. The butterflies. Sneaking away for a message. A genuine “good morning.” An unexpected “I miss you.” Knowing somewhere out there is someone who thought about you for no particular reason.

Can we have that too?

Just for a little while?

Just enough to remember that we’re human. That we’re interesting. That someone might still be excited to hear from us.

I’m not looking for someone to dump my problems on. I actually don’t want that.

I want someone I can be brutally honest with—and someone willing to give me that same raw honesty back. No résumé. No pretending we have everything figured out. Two people who can talk about the things they normally wouldn’t say out loud.

Maybe we trade memes first. Funny, dark, thoughtful, completely stupid—it doesn’t matter. Show me what makes your brain light up and I’ll show you mine.

That’s what I want right now.

And maybe a cup of coffee.

This one in this lonely house.

Maybe the next one with you.

Dm