u/TaxRevolutionary7886

I’m 20 and I’ve had genital issues my whole life that are wrecking my confidence and mental health. I’m not sure what I’m asking exactly; I just want to know if I’m “normal” and what I can realistically do.

Main issues:

- Phimosis / tight foreskin:
I can’t pull my foreskin back over the head without pain. Erections don’t hurt, but retraction does. There’s a tight band of skin on the left side of the head that seems to hold everything back and stop the foreskin from moving properly.

- Appearance / function:
Because of the tightness, my penis doesn’t look right to me, especially on the left where the skin is tethered. One side looks normal, the other looks strained with more visible veins.

When I get hard in shorts, my erection goes straight forward, rock hard, and I literally cannot bend it down to hide it. It’s fully visible and obvious, so I avoid wearing shorts. I can move it left/right, but I can’t bend it while erect at all.

- Fordyce spots / texture:
I have what I think are Fordyce spots all over my penis (probably around 100). I know they’re supposedly normal, but I find them gross. A year ago I tried popping two; they got bigger and never went away. I hate the texture and wish my skin were smoother.

- White patch on scrotum:
About a year ago a white patch appeared on my balls (maybe vitiligo). It hasn’t gone away and makes me even more self‑conscious.

How this affects me:

- Scared to have sex because I’m worried my partner will be turned off by how I look.
- Avoid shorts and certain situations because of visible boners and appearance.
- Very low self‑esteem; I feel unappealing and “not normal” compared to what I see online.

Money / care situation:

I don’t plan to see a urologist or dermatologist right now because I’m low on money and worried most of this (especially Fordyce/appearance stuff) will be considered cosmetic and not covered. I’m trying to figure out what’s realistically treatable and what’s medical vs cosmetic.

What I’m looking for:

- Am I normal? Is something medically wrong, or is this just how some penises look/function?
- Honest opinions on appearance: shape, veins, texture, color. Does this look “normal” to you? Would you be turned off, or is it within normal variation?
- If you’ve had surgery for phimosis/tight frenulum (frenuloplasty, preputioplasty, circumcision):
- Did it improve function and appearance?
- How was recovery?
- Was it worth it?
- If you’ve had cosmetic treatment for Fordyce spots (laser, micro‑punch, etc.):
- Was it worth it? How many sessions? Any scarring/sensation/color issues?
- Any experience with white patches on the scrotum/penis (possibly vitiligo) and treatment?
- If you’ve been in a similar situation with severe insecurity about penis appearance, how did you cope?

I know I “should” see a doctor, but with my budget I’m trying to get a realistic sense of what options exist and whether anything is worth the cost. Any advice or honest perspectives from people who’ve been through something similar would really help.

Thanks for reading.

Sources

I’m 20 and I’ve had genital issues my whole life that are wrecking my confidence and mental health. I’m not sure what I’m asking exactly; I just want to know if I’m “normal” and what I can realistically do.

Main issues:

- Phimosis / tight foreskin:
I can’t pull my foreskin back over the head without pain. Erections don’t hurt, but retraction does. There’s a tight band of skin on the left side of the head that seems to hold everything back and stop the foreskin from moving properly.

- Appearance / function:
Because of the tightness, my penis doesn’t look right to me, especially on the left where the skin is tethered. One side looks normal, the other looks strained with more visible veins.

When I get hard in shorts, my erection goes straight forward, rock hard, and I literally cannot bend it down to hide it. It’s fully visible and obvious, so I avoid wearing shorts. I can move it left/right, but I can’t bend it while erect at all.

- Fordyce spots / texture:
I have what I think are Fordyce spots all over my penis (probably around 100). I know they’re supposedly normal, but I find them gross. A year ago I tried popping two; they got bigger and never went away. I hate the texture and wish my skin were smoother.

- White patch on scrotum:
About a year ago a white patch appeared on my balls (maybe vitiligo). It hasn’t gone away and makes me even more self‑conscious.

How this affects me:

- Scared to have sex because I’m worried my partner will be turned off by how I look.
- Avoid shorts and certain situations because of visible boners and appearance.
- Very low self‑esteem; I feel unappealing and “not normal” compared to what I see online.

Money / care situation:

I don’t plan to see a urologist or dermatologist right now because I’m low on money and worried most of this (especially Fordyce/appearance stuff) will be considered cosmetic and not covered. I’m trying to figure out what’s realistically treatable and what’s medical vs cosmetic.

What I’m looking for:

- Am I normal? Is something medically wrong, or is this just how some penises look/function?
- Honest opinions on appearance: shape, veins, texture, color. Does this look “normal” to you? Would you be turned off, or is it within normal variation?
- If you’ve had surgery for phimosis/tight frenulum (frenuloplasty, preputioplasty, circumcision):
- Did it improve function and appearance?
- How was recovery?
- Was it worth it?
- If you’ve had cosmetic treatment for Fordyce spots (laser, micro‑punch, etc.):
- Was it worth it? How many sessions? Any scarring/sensation/color issues?
- Any experience with white patches on the scrotum/penis (possibly vitiligo) and treatment?
- If you’ve been in a similar situation with severe insecurity about penis appearance, how did you cope?

I know I “should” see a doctor, but with my budget I’m trying to get a realistic sense of what options exist and whether anything is worth the cost. Any advice or honest perspectives from people who’ve been through something similar would really help.

Thanks for reading.

I’m 20 and I’ve had genital issues my whole life that are wrecking my confidence and mental health. I’m not sure what I’m asking exactly; I just want to know if I’m “normal” and what I can realistically do.

Main issues:

- Phimosis / tight foreskin:
I can’t pull my foreskin back over the head without pain. Erections don’t hurt, but retraction does. There’s a tight band of skin on the left side of the head that seems to hold everything back and stop the foreskin from moving properly.

- Appearance / function:
Because of the tightness, my penis doesn’t look right to me, especially on the left where the skin is tethered. One side looks normal, the other looks strained with more visible veins.

When I get hard in shorts, my erection goes straight forward, rock hard, and I literally cannot bend it down to hide it. It’s fully visible and obvious, so I avoid wearing shorts. I can move it left/right, but I can’t bend it while erect at all.

- Fordyce spots / texture:
I have what I think are Fordyce spots all over my penis (probably around 100). I know they’re supposedly normal, but I find them gross. A year ago I tried popping two; they got bigger and never went away. I hate the texture and wish my skin were smoother.

- White patch on scrotum:
About a year ago a white patch appeared on my balls (maybe vitiligo). It hasn’t gone away and makes me even more self‑conscious.

How this affects me:

- Scared to have sex because I’m worried my partner will be turned off by how I look.
- Avoid shorts and certain situations because of visible boners and appearance.
- Very low self‑esteem; I feel unappealing and “not normal” compared to what I see online.

Money / care situation:

I don’t plan to see a urologist or dermatologist right now because I’m low on money and worried most of this (especially Fordyce/appearance stuff) will be considered cosmetic and not covered. I’m trying to figure out what’s realistically treatable and what’s medical vs cosmetic.

What I’m looking for:

- Am I normal? Is something medically wrong, or is this just how some penises look/function?
- Honest opinions on appearance: shape, veins, texture, color. Does this look “normal” to you? Would you be turned off, or is it within normal variation?
- If you’ve had surgery for phimosis/tight frenulum (frenuloplasty, preputioplasty, circumcision):
- Did it improve function and appearance?
- How was recovery?
- Was it worth it?
- If you’ve had cosmetic treatment for Fordyce spots (laser, micro‑punch, etc.):
- Was it worth it? How many sessions? Any scarring/sensation/color issues?
- Any experience with white patches on the scrotum/penis (possibly vitiligo) and treatment?
- If you’ve been in a similar situation with severe insecurity about penis appearance, how did you cope?

I know I “should” see a doctor, but with my budget I’m trying to get a realistic sense of what options exist and whether anything is worth the cost. Any advice or honest perspectives from people who’ve been through something similar would really help.

Thanks for reading.