u/desipatakhaa

So I've recently discovered these depraved dark kinks and I gotta say, I never expected myself to get involved in these so intentionally.

There's something really kinky and hot about these dark kinks, which turns me on more than any vanilla play. It seems I can never like soft and gentle stuff anymore.

So I've recently discovered these depraved dark kinks and I gotta say, I never expected myself to get involved in these so intentionally.

There's something really kinky and hot about these dark kinks, which turns me on more than any vanilla play. It seems I can never like soft and gentle stuff anymore.

Yep just like most of the others here, I've been filled with some deep depraved kinks too off late and it drives me so insanely but sometimes my morals makes me think if it's all good to imagine such stuff or should I stop.

Curious to know how other fellow kinksters balance it

It's been a while since I connected with genuine desi men. So I kinda wanted to experience that feeling again of being with a desi man, who knows how to treat and handle a mature woman in a proper way.

It's so much fun, when you find a man, who knows exactly what he's doing. I love it when he pushes me to the edge of breaking and keeps me craving for me. It may be unsettling but that's what makes it even more hot. The pleasure of not knowing what such men can do next, makes me really really feel wet at times.

It's so much fun, when you find a man, who knows exactly what he's doing. I love it when he pushes me to the edge of breaking and keeps me craving for me. It may be unsettling but that's what makes it even more hot. The pleasure of not knowing what such men can do next, makes me really really feel wet at times.

Writing about this already makes me uncomfortable but I guess it's time, I let it out for all to know.

Growing up, home never felt safe. Getting beaten by my parents became such a normal part of life that I stopped questioning it. I learned very early that love could come with pain, fear and humiliation.

Over time, it felt like something inside me broke. I became someone who expected pain before kindness. When I got older and started having sexual experiences, they weren't gentle either. Looking back, I realize how much of it mirrored what I already knew. The roughness, the lack of care, the feeling that my needs didn't matter it all felt strangely familiar. Not because I enjoyed being hurt but because pain was something I understood.

The worst part is that I was SA. That experience shattered whatever pieces of me were still holding together. I carried the shame, fear and confusion for years. Instead of processing it, I buried it and kept moving. But trauma doesn't disappear just because I ignored it.

So, most of the time, I find myself drawn toward situations that recreate the same feelings of helplessness, degradation, or emotional / physical pain. It's like my brain keeps trying to revisit the wound, hoping for a different ending.

I don't think I ever truly lost myself in a single moment. I think I lost myself slowly, piece by piece, over years of being hurt by people who were supposed to care about me.

I'm trying to understand the difference between what I genuinely want and what my trauma has taught me to want and honestly, I don't know where that line is anymore.

For years people found ways to make me feel like I was at fault for everything that happened to me. Maybe that's why I spent so long fighting myself. But I'm done doing that. My past shaped me, my trauma shaped me and this is who I am today. I don't expect everyone to understand it, I just need to accept it and I think I've finally done it.

Do you guys prefer an unexpected intense, rough & steamy morning sex as soon as you wake up or a well planned sweet, love making in candle lights after a cute dinner date.

Personally I like the first one, it makes the rest of the day so special. Laying rested on the bed, sweating all over the body after an unexpected steamy sex is something which is soo good to experience.

Do you guys prefer an unexpected intense, rough & steamy morning sex as soon as you wake up or a well planned sweet, love making in candle lights after a cute dinner date.

Personally I like the first one, it makes the rest of the day so special. Laying rested on the bed, sweating all over the body after an unexpected steamy sex is something which is soo good to experience.

Sometimes, I just feel these are just fantasies and not real but there are times like now, when I feel, I really wanna explore all those deep dark & depraved fantasies of mine.