u/Adventurous-Luck-649

help a girlie out my birthday is near i want to get some toys to play with

Last weekend I went out with my best friend and after a few drinks I stupidly confessed that I’ve had a crush on her boyfriend for a while and sometimes thought about him in ways I shouldn’t. I expected her to get angry or awkward, but she just looked at me for a second and then said, “If you really want to, you can.”

Things moved so fast after that. We went back to their apartment and she actually encouraged it. I ended up kissing him first, then making out with him on the couch while she watched. She joined in and before I knew it my clothes were off. I had sex with him while she was right there touching both of us. Then we switched and I went down on her while he was behind me. It felt crazy and wrong but so intense at the same time.

We kept going for hours in different positions. I’ve never done anything like that before. When we finally stopped and I woke up the next morning between them, I didn’t know what to feel. Part of me is ashamed because she’s my best friend, but another part can’t stop replaying it. I don’t know if this ruins our friendship or if she wants it to happen again. I’m so confused right now.