I’m not the best at flirting and to be honest, I’ve been told that I’m horrible at it but I know if I find a girl attractive and my friends have been telling me that I don’t understand what it is and I’m just wondering how do you know if there is sexual tension?
So I’m (M22) wondering, is there a more ethical way of finding FWB without apps?
The reason I ask is because it seems like literally every guy that I’m friends with has had multiple or has multiple FWB right now and they either used apps or they almost kind of manipulated. It seems like.
If they didn’t use apps, then the story always seems to be like they met a girl and did become friends with them and after a couple of weeks of like flirting and stuff ended up hooking up.
The part that gets to me though is that it seems like literally every time that they hook up they never like talked about if they wanted just FWB or a relationship and a lot of the times they just kind of made a move without talking about it at all.
I just really don’t like that because I genuinely want the friend apart in an FWB but even the girls that I’m friends with tell me you’re never supposed to ask just straight up like “do you wanna hook up?” and I just don’t understand what you’re supposed to do.
Other than apps, how do you hook ups or friends with benefits actually happen IRL?
Kinda was just talking with some of my friends recently about how to be honest I kind of just want something more like an FWB but with an actual friend and most of them that have been in them said you have to flirt and if you can’t, it’s kind of impossible, but I literally cannot flirt at all
I can tease, but I’ve been told that teasing isn’t flirting. I can compliment, but I’ve been complementing isn’t flirting. I can crack sexual jokes, but I’ve been told that’s not flirting either.
I’m just wondering because to be honest I have heard mixed answers and I’ve heard of stuff even almost happening in my friend group IRL, but I’m wondering how common are threesomes or moresomes irl
How do these things even come up?
Not trying to sound like I’m (M21) a pussy or anything, but like I’m genuinely just buns when it comes to flirting. All of my friends are trying to give me advice, but they can never give me advice on how to flirt and I don’t know when I should really do
To be honest, the girls that have really ever been into me are girls that I’m friends with or they’re friends and I’m not even sure if they were to me or not
Also, I’m not trying to make it seem like I only want to hook up with the girls that I’m friends with. Some of them are genuinely only would really want friendships with, but I know that someone probably be OK with being FWB or hooking up and I’m just wondering like Because some of my friends and I will take each other’s words out of context and make it sexual and joke around or we will talk about the sexual stuff that maybe we’d wanna try one day and I didn’t know like is there a good way about trying to hook up if they’re wanting without flirting?
Probably asking a very stupid and idiotic question here, but I’ve (M20) never heard of somebody like straight up asking somebody else “hey wanna have sex” but I hear about people having sex with their exes all the time
Pretty much not a single person in my age has their own place so usually they only like bring over somebody who is only friends and nothing will happen with over but I’m wondering how does that stuff even happen between exes?
I (M22) just don’t really understand because pretty much me and my friends are open to each other about a lot and my friends were telling me it’s kind of weird that I’m 22 and I’ve never talked about sex with a girl and it being more or the girl or even kissed a girl and it’s unusual
Like even the girls and I’m friends with her told me before and the guys who also told me that the opposite gender friends pretty much always flirt or start talking about sexual stuff that leads to more