36 [M4F] #NY #Online - Sub-leaning guy looking for something real, with open and honest communication, a slow-burn, and a healthy approach to kink
Hi! To start off, I currently live in upstate NY, but spent some 25 years living all over NYC, so a part of me will always be from the city. I was born in Europe, though, and retain a slight accent, so if you're not into accents, turn back now! I'm also 5’11, lean, have long dark hair, and blue eyes. No tats, but it's on my roster. If it makes any difference, I'm uncut.
I like biking, hiking, cooking, baking (still learning), long walks, music, reading, writing, video games, and ping pong. I do some light gardening, too. I'm also a huge fan of horror films. I'll watch and enjoy nearly any horror movie in existence.
I'm self employed, so I've got a flexible schedule and lots of downtime, but I'm also an early owl. I love to spend the early morning outside, coffee in-hand, listening to the sound of birds.
Kink wise, I'm super flexible, but mental domination is at the center of my entire kink identity. I'm willing to try almost anything, since at the core of it all, I'd just like to experience deeper and deeper levels of kink with someone of a like mind.
I've experimented heavily with orgasm control, erotic hypnosis, tease and denial, impact play, bondage, exhibitionism, surveillance, nipple play, and power exchange. I was also in a slave dynamic for a while, with total power exchange, and throughout it all, I learned exactly how much control I'm willing to allow another person to have over me.
I'm looking for someone I can share my life with who's also into kink, but not someone who wants total control. I learned in therapy that in the past, I've used kink as an escapism mechanism, and I no longer do that. There was lots of self reflection and trauma processing to get to the point where I know exactly what I want. I learned along the way that I'm also more than willing to be a switch, and enjoy it, but at heart, I still enjoy giving up more and more of my power to someone else.
I don't want to jump into anything quickly. I'd like to get to know you first. It's important to me that we can both respect each other's boundaries without feeling like we aren't getting our needs met, and that takes time to figure out.
Lastly, I've had too much codependency and enmeshment in the past, and I won't be falling for that ever again, so please be a self-led mind.
I've become pretty discerning in my age.
Oh, and please don't be too young. Ideally, 30+. Also, if you just want to be friends, that's cool too!