u/Bubbly-Can-3024

Sitting in a harm reduction centre, sipping some hot coffee, after coming in for some meth pipes.

I sat here wondering what type of coffee they serve. It's free, and better than anything I've ever gotten at Tim Hortons or McDonald's. Funny how that works.

Part of me is "happy" that I can get my paraphernalia here, clean and safe rather than doing something desperate that could cause an infection. Im going to smoke regardless. 

I walk up to the counter. "Can I get some meth pipes?"

"One or two?"

"Two please, and can I get a coffee with that?", I ask as if I'm casually ordering a coffee to go with my breakfast.

Part of me knows these places are the exact type of shit that enables people to keep using. 

Keeps them alive for now but kills em slow for the future.

Keeps them alive for a profit, preying on the disease that is addiction.

With altruism as the disguise. 

"Here's your meth pipes and coffee!", she places them down in front of me, sing-songy with a friendly smile. Everybody seems too cheerful about this. 

"Would you like a mouth piece with that?"

It's honestly a bit dystopian. 

I don't believe the workers are to blame. I see them as they converse with those who walk in and out through the doors. They treat them as humans when, for a lot of them, nobody else really bothers. Many of them are barely addressed by their first name outside of here. It's a lonely, dark life for many. The workers ask about their day, joke around with them like friends, listen to them vent. It feels like a supportive, tight-knit community on the surface. I know as individuals, the goal isn't to enable anybody. They seem to genuinely care.

I do, however, believe that the majority are brainwashed into believing that this is what is right. I try to surpress the feeling because it feels dehumanizing towards them. I don't surpress it for their sake, I just rather not feel so alone. 

(I wasn't sure what subreddit to put this on but in high on meth and looking for a convo about this I guess)

Conservatives are out dated sheep. They go with what they know. They are ignorant and refuse to educate themselves. They cannot and will not think outside the box. It would destroy what they've always known if they started questioning or looking into things. It would shatter their identity and what they've built their lives off of.

Liberals are modern day, updated sheep. They're very much stuck in their ways as well. All they know is that conservative ideologies and values = bad, racist, transphobic etc. Censorship runs rampid. They too refuse to think outside the box.

One day liberals will be the new conservatives when something else comes along.

Ultimately, no matter what side you pick, you fail to realize that your government doesn't give a shit about you, and anything positive they do for you was only done because they knew they'd benefit financially.

I identify as anti establishment. I trust none of it. But isn't not trusting the government or society just another layer of sheepism? No matter what, you'll always have to pick a stance when you live in a society where it's constantly in your face, and everything, everywhere, and everybody is governed/owned/controlled by somebody or a system, and everything is a fucking political argument. You're a sheep by default. It's only human nature that you'd at least subconsciously pick a stance, even if you tell yourself you're not political.

Even apathy(which is different than anti establishment) is picking a stance. You're apathetic for a reason. You're burnt out with it all, something conflicts with your morals, etc etc.

I have been smoking daily for a year and a half. High went from lasting 8 hours off one puff to feeling exhausted after three and wanting to nap. The only way to counter it is to smoke a whole bunch at once to the point of severe anxiety+relief when the anxiety subsides which basically acts as the "high", and to the point where I'm dizzy and outta breath