Ideas for resources to look at with my partner?
I (31F) have been in a romantic relationship (my first!) with my amazing boyfriend (39M) for nearly 6 months, and we both knew from the start that I was looking for something with a D/S dynamic as part of it (we met after I posted a BDSMpersonals ad). He had a little experience as a switch before me but I think having a power exchange as part of a long term relationship is relatively new to both of us.
I am finding that I have to lead the dynamic a little more than I might perhaps like to in the bedroom (I'm totally fine with a much more 50:50 approach out of it, and that's all great). I think this is stemming in part from a really admirable desire of his to make sure I'm always enjoying myself (and maybe a slight lack of confidence on his part?), but in the moment, when I'm in subspace, I can find it pretty disorientating to be constantly asked what I want, and I just really crave him taking control more. Every new thing we try, it's me bringing it up, and then giving lots and lots of reassurance that it's ok, and him asking questions about what I want to do next, and I really just want him to do what he wants with me, you know? I have tried bringing this up a couple of different ways, but I don't always feel like I have the language to describe what I need/ am asking him for (or maybe, he is not feeling able to tell me why he doesn't want to do it?). Every time I have brought it up he has said he's enjoying a Dom role, and is though sometimes he says the planning can be a bit tiring.
We had some really positive breakthroughs after doing one of those BDSM preference quizzes together, and tried a few new things that we both definitely enjoy after that, but I feel like I don't quite know how to keep the conversation going. Does anyone have any good recs for things to read or watch together that have helped you deepen your dynamic, and given your partner confidence to go "more Dom" as it were?