u/DisplayLevel46

My dear, treasured friend. We must acknowledge at this point you have departed us. I know you had such aspirations for this place. Such hopes of finding this ‘spark’ that you see referred to every seven minutes on Reddit. I have read the word ‘spark’ so many times I’m questioning the etymology of those five letters which float across my eyeballs at every waking moment.

Early on I know you were confident of success: 35. Married. Father. Corporate professional injecting caffeine into eyeballs. Attractive. Heavy consumer of books. Runner.

But you see, that is not enough. You understand now the machine that is Reddit is only here to pull you into its ever turning wheel and chew through your flesh and leave you in the ditch asking if anyone has any ‘spark’.

It’s best we acknowledge your spirit is crushed. Extinct. Return to your repeat viewings of Kitchen Nightmares. Casually flirt with colleagues to maintain a semblance of sanity. Do what must be done.

But for the love of god, do not hold out hope for Reddit.

Except for the lurkers. Every now and then a good lurker comes along.

*notabot !

So there’s these bombs in the city. Put there by a German Jeremy Irons. But he’s not really German. He’s pretending. Well, acting. But in the film he is German. And he’s in love with John Goodman. A down on his luck gumshoe detective who has been betrayed by his husband of eight years, Paul Mescal. Love is complicated.

I’m watching this movie thinking to myself ‘hey, why not? What’s wrong with putting some bombs in the subway and calling up your lover to tell them “Kiss me by midnight or I’ll blow this city up”. And sure, maybe your lover isn’t John Goodman in a saucy brown wide brimmed hat, open coat as his chest hair billows in the wind. But, you have to plant your bombs across the city and let love find you.

Married into the double digits. Parent to those tiny humans who don’t know how to plant bombs. Daily corporate world bonanza where unfortunately I don’t get to do presentations on Reddit OA. Instead spend day talking into screen about other less important things.

Attractive. Looks good in the first photo I show you. Looks good after the fifth when there is often a slow reveal of quality decline. You’re not getting a dud deal.

In shape. Thin. Can button up a shirt.

Rather read a book over just about anything. Will run around daily too.

Need mental stimulation in this space.

Please share your own thoughts on Jeremy Irons and whether his Germanic lineage ticks every box for you