Wikipedia : « A Side is a person who does not engage in anal or penetrative sex but rather enjoys non-penetrative sex like oral, frotting, masturbation »
Genuine question for fellow sides.
I feel like our experience is weirdly invisible, even within the gay community. Tops and bottoms have their whole thing, but sides are kind of just… there.
Would love to hear from you :
• What’s the hardest part of identifying as a side, socially, in dating, in relationships?
• Do you ever feel pressure to “pick a side” (no pun intended)?
• What do you wish people understood about being a side that they usually don’t?
For me, I’ve always felt the pressure of having to like anal sex, to fit the « top / bottom » narrative even though I HATED both being a top or a bottom. I almost felt incomplete, or that I’d never find someone who’d accept me as I am. And whenever I fancied guys it was never in a penetrative way.
My other impression is that whenever I had discussions on dating apps with other guys who said they didn’t like anal sex, the conversations were always deeper vs purely sexual inuendos. Which makes me think maybe Sides have a greater interest in non-sexual connections? Idk
And at last, when I found out that « Side » was actually a real sexual identity, I felt sooo liberated. Like I’m normal, I’m not alone and there are other people like me.
Curious to hear your thoughts from Sides and othersss