Hello all! First time posting here, but I’ve lurked for a while 😜. I’ve been interested in kink for several years at this point and have had very few chances to genuinely explore this interest, beyond having a submissive for a shorter period of time a few years ago. I’m wanting to explore this interest, but I feel overwhelmed with where to start beyond reading (in the middle of “Screw the Roses, Give Me the Thorns”). I tend to be a hands-on learner, and it’s difficult to feel excited or inspired about kink when I don’t have that as an option. My long-term partner is very new to the concept and is still exploring whether or not they are interested (we are monogamous). They have said they would be open to me exploring at munches, maybe going to a kink party, and potentially having a sub, but I’m scared that getting into this world without them will a) make me bite even more at the bit to engage with them in this manner and b) become emotionally difficult for both of us if I take on a sub. On top of this, I feel awkward going to a munch or kink party to learn without directly engaging with actions there, but I really want to attempt this if it isn’t considered rude.
All this to say, is it okay for a baby Dom like me, with my limited experience, to attend these events but not necessarily directly participate? How do I prepare for these spaces when I’ve never had the chance to explore them? And how can I safely learn without directly engaging my SO, without scaring them off since I am so gosh darn green?
Edit: my concern with attending a munch is that it might be weird for me to show up with an interest in getting to know people but not an interest in starting a relationship with anyone there. But based on some comments below, I might be overthinking this!