u/EmiliaTann

Hi! I've been around this forum for a while now and have had three meetups as a result, and it's taught me a bit about what I'm looking for when I meet someone, and I hope these resonate with you.

1. First and most important is honesty - in what we want and otherwise. My first Muffdive comprised of a meal out at an Izakaya, a wander around Donki, and the train home, and I knew it the moment we met. We exchanged pictures online before the meet, but once we were face to face it turned out they gave me a 10 year old picture and they looked very different. I didn't mind how they looked and still made the most of the evening, but felt that trust was already broken and I'm not going alone to a bedroom without enough trust, a good lesson from this Muffdive. While I think it's fine to put your best foot forward in the first picture we send each other - we all have our best days, and my favourite picture of myself is years old as well - but it should be backed up by the recent reality. No first minute surprises! The second part is the aim of our meeting. I am seeking to give you pleasure as I greatly enjoy it and have received praise for my tongue in the past, and it's a unique way to meet people abroad! I am a switch and enjoy bringing power dynamics into any such meeting, but don't require it to have fun, so mentioning how you feel about this would be a good way to start a conversation - or a point to bring up further into it, if you prefer small talk before intimate talks that's fine as well.
2. Second is the vibe check, which is more than just looks. I find the talk beforehand leading up to meeting can be as important as anything else. Set the stage, calm some nerves. My second Muffdive meeting was a tour of Shibuya for an hour before we parted ways and other than a brief few messages after didn't meet again. This was intentional - we both happened to have an hour free, not enough to jump to intimacy but enough to get a feel of each other. (A metaphorical feel!) We walked, explored, and engaged in small talk while I pointed out all the live music houses I'd visited in Shibuya along the way (Japanese music is half my reason for coming to Japan) as well as a few other choice spots. I had enough fun, but I feel like it felt clear the vibes weren't there. She was attractive, and I felt confident enough in myself that day, but not everybody is meant to have sex with everybody - shocking, I know! 2 Muff's down with 0 dives - but I'm glad I didn't in either case. Meeting doesn't obligate sex, it just opens a door for us. And on that note, I have lived in Tokyo for a year on and off and have passed N5 Japanese at least, so I can handle a few basic interactions and know a thing or three about the city if you think a similar introduction would suit you - and if the vibes aren't there, there's still something gained regardless!
3. Finally, Mutual Attraction. And this is more than just looks, it's everything. My third muffdive was back in Britain and messaged me after ghosting me years prior, but I remeber having a good conversation with them. We hit it off quickly, as it seemed our personality types fit quite well. We turned to intimate topics after some catching up on the last few years conversation, and they let me know they were inexperienced but excited - I'm happy to go at whatever pace is comfortable. We set a date and kept talking and flirting and our kinks came out before long, which shaped the meeting thereafter. And the date came and there was a few awkward minutes as first, as I find there often is in meeting something new, but we got on before long as we explored the city, shared a bubble tea, brought the flirting to reality successfully. Looked around a few shops, visited a supermarket because I needed some katsu, then I asked how they felt about us going back to their house (the pre-established plan if things went well). They clicked for me and I was excited at the thought of getting to spend some more time with them. They eagerly agreed, we exchanged a kiss, and then the rest is behind closed doors, but in the end it made for a successful Muffdive and thereafter hasn't been a one off.

And that leads me to now, as I seek someone who shares these values and finds them appealing! Thank you for reading my slightly lengthy post and I hope it spoke to you. Now as for availability... I'm in Tokyo from the 29th of April to the 24th of May. If your time here overlaps, be that as a tourist or resident, please send me a message with a little bit about yourself so we can get a conversation going! I particularly enjoy the Gardens, Music, Food, and Nerdy side of Japan, if you want somewhere to jump onto And finally if our times don't line up, feel free to send a quick message anyway as I often return to Japan so you might catch me again.