51 [M4F] 20024 - You Know Better Than This, Which Is Exactly Why You’re Still Reading
51, 5’10”, 220 lbs. Salt-and-pepper hair because distinguished is just grey that learned to market itself. Brown eyes that have seen things. Comfortable in my own skin, which at this point has the structural integrity of a well-loved couch — still great to sit on, just makes a little noise getting up.
My communication style is dad joke meets smartass with occasional flashes of genuine depth that will catch you off guard. I’ll open with “Are you tired? Wanna go to bed?” and somehow make it work. If you roast me back and it lands, I’ll respect you more than most people I know.
The situation: Married. Hosting in Southwest DC in my apartment between the Wharf and Waterfront Station. Weekdays 3–7, some weekends. If being the "other woman" sounds like a pro rather than a con, we’re compatible already.
You: 18+, sharp, funny, shorter than me, and comfortable letting a man take the lead when the moment calls for it. Wit is mandatory. A warm, empathetic side underneath it earns bonus points.
The bedroom: I take control. I take care of my partner. Both of those are non-negotiable and both are very much in your favor.
Full disclosure: The grooming situation down south is currently… untamed wilderness. I’m open to a volunteer to help shave it. Resume not required, enthusiasm preferred.
Not here for games. Just the fun, slightly reckless excitement of doing something we probably shouldn’t with someone genuinely worth doing it with.
Hit me with something good. Generic openers get creative responses. Bad puns get enthusiastic encouragement.