u/FootballAccurate1810

I am a male and never had sex ever in my life, one year ago i got my first blowjob which was like a very brief time 2 min maximum , after that i have never had any physical contact with anyone, , 😞which i regret till this day , because from that night i have never known what peave feels like now i am in a relationship but its been over 10 months , i have never touched my gf because i am afraid that nothing should happen to her, and every sensation in my body leads to thinking i have an std and i also have h*v, i feel like i lost everything , i cant just explain how it feels , only consoling thing is the thought of death,

M 23 I have never had sex or anything more than a kiss, that too its been a year since i had any physical contact, a year before i received an oral that was the first time , after that incident I regretted it so much because i am a very anxious person, even though its still been a year i still think i have an std or hiv , and my life is gone , i am so afraid to even get tested because what if it comes positive, the thing that triggered all this is after that oral that night i had some discomfort on my genital like 1 on a scale of 10 and i cleaned myself and never got anything more just that , and thats all , i had no health issues but i started googling and everything my thoughts became worse i literally thought od taking my life too, because of the shame and guilt, although time has passed but that anxiety triggers even with small things like hearing about stds and hiv , I couldnt get ahead of life or do anything, i feel so bad , ;(