Curious but worried
Temporary account. My(40f) husband(42m) explained about this lifestyle nearly 2 years ago. We have been married for 15 years and trust each other to the core. I had casual sex few times before marriage but I'm the first and the only one for my husband. He has a low drive and small size. Though sex is non-existent for the past few years, I made peace with my current life. My husband has been encouraging me to try outside for the past 2 years. He wants me to play solo and explain him afterwards.
Initially, I said No. Over time I started enjoying dirty talks between us and started listening to romantic stories.
Now I want to try but am afraid of consequences and the religious beliefs.
In the place we are, there aren't clubs or similar places. We don't have the luxury of travel or strangers. One person I could think about is an ex from college. He still likes me as we talk/flirt but nothing more. He is married and his wife will never accept this.
If you have faced similar situation, how will you react? What will you do?