u/Montidaho

So many people wasting each other's time!... many people have told us, "paid apps are the way to go to weed out fakes and flakes". We are trying because flakes/ghosts are RAMPANT here apparently and its exhausting.

Example yesterday: On Kasidie app/site, we had an attractive and experienced older couple REACH OUT TO US saying they saw we were new and would "love to show us the ropes"

We were flattered, and chatted more for a good while. Their messages were longer and well thought out it seemed. They then invited us to either a telegram or 4 way text chat. We agreed and said we'd prefer the group text option since neither of us have telegram set up.

Next message back: "probably not a great fit. Good luck."

What!?!? Why the hell are you wasting people's time? Seems to be a ssuuuuuper annoying fucking theme. Is every app, including paid ones, just a bucket of horny dudes blasting people without checking with their wives first?

Don't get me wrong, you can change your mind and nobody owes us anything... but why in the world do so many people do this time wasting shit? Literally nothing changed between "let's all chat!" and "fuck everything we said all day, get lost"

We don't want to waste people's time and we don't want our time wasted. This is supposed to be fun, but it's starting to feel like the entire world is nothing but a Facebook marketplace posting with a bunch of bored unemployed old guys kicking tires.

Rant over.

We've struggled to find play partners that actually commit to doing anything. Lots of flirting and such through messaging, but then they just kinda disappear. Maybe its us? Maybe its flakes?

We kinda hoped if we didn't fit the other couples' vibes perfectly, we may get at least someone saying "we have other friends that may be interested in talking with you" and then put them in contact with us... kinda like a girl might do for her friend "there's a guy you should meet"

Is this a thing that happens once we meet solid people? I know giving contact out without permission would be a huge no, but seems many would like the recommend?

My wife has been very enthusiastic about giving me an experience with another woman. She is not, bi but would love to feel and caress, massage and be pleasured by another lady while we all have fun. She has been teasing me about it a lot lately and we've been having great sex while fantasizing about it as well while looking.

We understand the ideal situation we discussed is called a "unicorn" for a reason... because Unicorns aren't rare. They aren't real.

For that reason, we are also considering couples, but cautiously. We are both very clean people and I have a vasectomy and neither of us enjoy condoms at all (spoiled I know). We would want our partners to be extra safe for her too if a guy was along... a guy for her to play with would be awesome tbh.

I think we're both sexy. Maybe not supermodels, but 36/37 years old and fairly fit. She's short petite, blonde, busty, and beautiful... all my guy friends want at her for sure and she turns heads. I am 5'11" 185lbs, called handsome by many of her friends, and a bit above average in the pants with what she calls "a beautiful dick"

So here's the rub... we're in Montana and it seems the community seems very small and absolutely completely chock full of flakes. Maybe its disinterest, but compared to most we see, I think we're at least in the more attractive crowd around here? We're chill and open.

Are we looking for something that doesn't exist? Our only place to find connections so far is reddit subs (theres like 3 in MT with mostly onlyfans account promos) and dating apps. We don't know where to meet people, and asking our cute friends without knowing for sure they are open to it seems too bold right now.

Neither of us is disappointed in the other at all, but with all the eager talk and fantasizing and trying, it feels harder than finding each other was. I thought the swinging community would be full of sexy couples wanting sexy times, but it appears to be mostly full of people wanting to share some pics, talk dirty for an evening, and then never agree to meet.

Are unicorns and unicouples real, or is Montana likely just not going to work?