Question for the women who indulge in sex at a young age or were sexually abused. I Need your thoughts on this please, because of your experiences.
I’m a devoted husband and father , and I love my wife. But I feel like she hides parts of her self from me, still after many years of marriage. In the beginning I would pry about her past but now I just leave it alone and let God handle it, but I’m human and it still bothers me( not stressful, just bothers me) I’m just a little hurst that she won’t share with me even at my experience of understanding.
See, when I was young I was molested at the age of
7 by my male cousin. And then a couple of times by others male family members up until the age of 11. I also grew up in a very bad home were there were a lot of fight and I would get beat for no reason.And I think it kind of drove my sex drive up and psychologically mixed up . Not sure how to describe it but it drove my sex drive mad. Between those ages I would also indulge and participate in it because I liked it. But as an adult now I sought professional help and thank God im good now.
Fast forward to my wife now , same thing happened to her.from the inception of our relationship these are the following things she told me and during our rough patches these are the things that happened.
When we first dated she said she indulge in sex with her uncle and she enjoyed it and she cried when she told me.
This happen to her and some other girls including her cousin. She told me how her uncle would chose her cousin over her because she was light skin.
One day she was taking a shower and I open the door accidentally to use the bathroom and she yelled at me, she said how her uncle and another uncle would just bardge in the bathroom when she was showering.
After a week into marriage I found she was on dating apps.she denied it.
One day we were arguing and her mood just flip into nice person and she said babe imma go to the gym. But I followed her secretly and didn’t find her at the gym.
One day we both went to the gym and there was a man exercising and his dick print was out , she went to the machine in front of him . And may be I’m overthinking this one but with everything that happen so far I couldn’t help but think she was starting at his package.
After I found out in our pass she was “cheating on me” I was hurt but after a while I found myself getting around by the idea of her fucking another man.
When I brought up the idea of Hotwifing she was hurt and cried about it. And was very angry at me.
In conclusion I know I’m not naive, she probably cheated on me many times. (I did my dirt too out of hurt) but we’re good and in a great place now, but I’m still disappointed because I still don’t know the truth or I still do t o ow my wife fully. If you’re a believer please pray for me and my marriage.
Either her experiences made her a sex addict and she needs help. She covers her hurt with success.There ‘s definitely something spiritual and psychologically wrong with my wife and love her so much I just want her to heal and give me her all. No matter what 😢
Ladies and prayer warriors advice please