r/hypersexuality

I've posted here before. Hypersexuality and sex addiction guides my life. I've made it work. My whole schedule and routine is built around sex and masturbation, despite being a wife and mother. I have side partners, my husband doesn't know. It's not his fault, but he wouldn't understand. I feel like I manage it well but I have outbursts of complete lack of control that scare me. Sex in dangerous situations where I could be found. High risk. All for the need to feel that high. To feel like I'm okay because not having sex makes me feel like I'm holding my breath. I always try to make sure I have sex in safe situations to make sure my marriage stays intact, but I messed up this holiday weekend and had very high risk sex with my husband's friend and I felt out of control again. It scares me when I get like this.

The sexual urges have become completely overwhelming, and it feels like things are only getting worse. Masturbation doesn't even come close to cutting it anymore, and the constant physical frustration is starting to take a toll. Even though I am in a relationship and we have a very active sex life, I still leave those encounters feeling completely unfulfilled and empty. It is terrifying to think about opening up to my partner about this. It isn't because they would react poorly or get angry, but rather because I am terrified that admitting this will make them feel inadequate or like they aren't satisfying me. I just desperately want to understand why my body and mind are stuck in this endless cycle and what is actually wrong with me. I need to figure out how to manage these intense compulsions and finally find some peace.

It’s difficult at best to find someone who can discuss this subject with objectivity and an open mind . So many are so quick to throw a label . When they flat out refuse to hear the story of how “we” we got to this point . Yet “we” continue to be bogged down by vanilla culture and experiences that the masses are obsessed with .

This is inspired by discussions that explore how HS can send us all down the taboo rabbit holes.

In most recent times, the most erotic moments for me were not ones that pushed on my boundaries for taboo. They were just moments where something about the experience set off my ultra hyper arousal. I am lucky to have such a responsive body. I appreciate that this isnt something that is attainable for all, its not something attainable for me every time i have sex.

But when i do enter that zone.. fk. Being extremely aroused and able to cum from someone almost touching is crazy. Witnessing how my enjoyment affects the other person

The vanilla vs non vanilla thing for me doesnt really exist because if my mind and body are truly connected and willing.. i dont really even need a touch just the anticipation of it. - - which is why i am incredibly grateful to have ADHD 😅 summer breezes would end me if my brain was not easily distracted.

I know this post has a nsfw vibe. Just if you reply, dont be explicit in that reply so that it doesnt break our rules. I wanted a space for those of us who can sit in the shallow end of the pool forever and still get off. Id like to feel like less of a freak 😅

I've noticed something lately, and I'm wondering if anyone else with hypersexuality feels the same.

I enjoy geek communities because I want to see people's creativity: cosplay, fan art, discussions, collections, and shared interests. But it feels like more and more cosplay posts are just thinly disguised OnlyFans advertisements. It's often a cheap costume with the focus almost entirely on showing skin rather than the character itself.

Normally I'd just scroll past. But because I struggle with hypersexuality, constant exposure to thirst traps is mentally exhausting. It keeps pulling my attention in a direction I'm actively trying to manage, and after seeing dozens of these posts across different subreddits, it starts to wear me down.

I'm not judging people for doing OnlyFans. Everyone has the right to make their own choices.

What makes it difficult is that hypersexuality has actually made me want *less* random sexual content in my everyday life, not more. It's a bit like trying to improve your diet while being surrounded by junk food everywhere you go. Even if you don't consume it, the constant exposure becomes tiring.

Does anyone else with hypersexuality experience this? If so, how do you deal with it without abandoning communities you genuinely enjoy?

Today my brain just isn’t on fire and it’s nice. I found the small joy of a cold Red Bull on a hot morning.

Thinking of you all, some days are incredibly hard, sharing whatever peace I have.

I did some therapy today, not sure why...I should know better, but did, was really tired after, so had a couple of drinks and took a nap. Woke up, really wound up, not really horny but just feeling self destructive. I was either going to cut or fuck. Met this guy leaving some club, so we go to an alley and do things. He then bends me over a railing and when I tell him no, he laughs and says is all good, I'm just a slut and used to it. He finished, laughs, and just left me there. I still hate myself but I know I deserved it.

i’m hypersexual and I almost always masturbate right after having sex usually with my partner lying right next to me. I’ll have them lick my cum or I’ll cum on their pussy or tits and keep touching myself.

This has been my thing since middle school.

Anyone else get woken up (or wake their partner) in the middle of the night for sex, then go right back to masturbating afterward? Sleeping naked while doing all this, combined with kinks and taboos, feels like the highest level of sex positivity to me.

(this is kind of a long rant, I just really need it right now ++ english is not my first language sorry in advance)

I believe my hypersexuality is rooted in my childhood trauma and over the years I've learned to accept it and understand myself. As I learned how to deal with it with masturbation, I've given myself grace and made peace with the fact that I might really be more sexual than other ppl so I usually just let myself be.

I know that consuming porn to some extent really does have negative effects on our brain but I tell myself that my consumption of it is "normal" and it simply makes me feel accompanied so I let myself be with the urges. I say that I get it over with it fast when watching since I usually tend to finish along with the person in the video. I live alone too so I can do it whenever I want and I do it mostly to pass time and relieve stress.

Lately I've been more self aware of my brain fog mostly because I can see how it manifests in my academics even tho I do my best to study.

Usually, I'd think that its due to my screentime and sleeping schedule (its probably a factor) but I got curious if hypersexuality can cause it. Before coming here I've read a few articles about how HS compulsiveness induces memory and focus impairment. I've read that it has something to do with dopamine surges that can harm our brain's reward pathway.

Anyway, I'm not blaming my brain fog on HS solely. I just wanted to open a discussion regarding this because I'm trying to manage my compulsiveness more. I've just deleted my access to the site I usually watch on. I'd like to not to rely on consuming pornography when in need to pleasure myself since I believe that porn-addiction is real. I'm working on managing my screentime in general.

I hope I get better even if this isn't necessarily a sickness. I just really feel so dumb lately. Even when I put it in effort to learn, I feel like my brain can't keep up.

I don't think talking to my partner and friends about this "brain fog" will make me feel better. I don't want to sound like I'm choosing to dwell on self pity.

But I really need to put these thoughts and feelings somewhere.

where are ppl sharing this omg

I just can't with vanilla sex.

I need risk. I need filthy dirty talk. I need taboos. Just fucking in missionary does jack shit for me.

And it's not always easy to find men who are good at it.

Even sexting gets boring because all they wanna do is talk about fucking me lmao.

Where is the spice guys!!

Why is my brain wired like this. Why can't I just enjoy dick like a normal girl. Ggrrrrr

Hi y’all

I have recently been coming to terms with my issues with hyper sexuality. But I’ve been noticing one of my major triggers is religion. I am an ex-Catholic who was raised with a lot of shame surrounding sex, on top of being SA’d by a same sex family member and not believed about it…

Recently, Ive been getting super triggered by my partner’s Christian parents not allowing us to sleep in the same room when we go over , or not even inviting me to overnight trips. I was explained to my partner that his parents are uncomfortable about us not being married and potentially being in a tempting situation to engage in sin.

My feelings around this is that I feel like I’m being treated less than… my partners sister is married but they have not been together nearly as long as we have. Yet they don’t treat her nor her husband in the same way. The only reason for not getting married is because of our financial situation, and not feeling like it is the right time yet considering our personal healing journeys.

I feel like they think I’m a whore…even if they’re not outwardly saying that. And I have been looked down upon by others from my promiscuous behaviors before. So it just makes me feel like relapsing…but I don’t want to hurt my partner. It’s really frustrating and I don’t know what to do.

I'm wondering if guys ever used, disgusted with themselves after a random hookup. I mean, I'm pretty much used to the feelings after a trick, but knowing how guys are always ready, do they ever feel sick or dirty or disgusted with themself or is it the chick is just another piece of meat.

I have given up trying to fight it. I know I'm messed up. I know my hypersexuality has a grip on me I can never stop. I know that the dark thoughts and desires I have will never go away. I'm done fighting it and denying my true self.

Context: I am a young adult, AFAB person who although isn't really diagnosed, share a lot of symptoms and relate heavily to the hypersexual experience and troubles. I've been dealing with something very recently and I want help

Basically I've been dealing with this thing where I get super horny and turned on at night before bed after rough mental days and it's hard for me to sleep. I don't want to constantly jerk off because I know that leads to stuff like infections and hurt privates if not careful

It's causing my sleep and mood to become worse though

Is there any way to help with this? That doesn't involve relieving or anything similar (again, points above)

I just don't want it to potentially get worse

EDIT: I'm 22 and I'm taken, please don't message me because it does make me uncomfortable. A comment is fine

I’ve been with my wife for 12 years now. I’ve always been wildly attracted to her. I swear I’m a normal enough guy. My wife is a little shy and struggles a little bit with body image (even though I don’t think she has any reason to).

I posted her to Reddit for the first time about two years ago and she was incredibly popular. It was very addicting to me and really what first opened me to my hypersexuality. It became too time-consuming so I tried to stop cold turkey… But I keep relapsing in coming back to do it. I do not have an addictive personality but whenever I share her I get this crazy head high…. it’s hard to explain.

She knows about all this and is supportive of me and consents to it, but she knows I’m struggling with it.

I’ve been fantasising more and more about wanting to try something in the real world with a threesome or something like that… But that feels like a door that you can’t close after you open it necessarily.

Not sure what to do next

I gave up fighting it a long time ago. whenever i tried to push it down, it always came back stronger, deeper, and way darker. There are still moments when life expects me to be sane and respectable and i actually feel proud that i can pull it together and stay in control for a while. But the second that control slips… the taste of losing it never leaves me. the insane highs, the way my darkest desires line up perfectly, the feeling of turning into the perfect little toy...nothing else comes close.

Leaning into it without inhibitions and guilt changed everything. i love myself more every single day for being this way. i’m not emotionally clingy at all and i love that my hedonistic side always takes priority. i train hard every morning (runs, yoga, pilates, kegels) not just to stay fit but because i want to be even more fuckable and learn those special little talents men crave. i pick my outfits like i’m designing the whole day / night around how slutty and magnetic i want to feel.

I genuinely feel blessed that i’m hypersexual. I love this beautiful craziness and all the intense pleasures it brings me. life would feel so flat and boring without it.

I mean, intimate scent of course.
I really love it. Every time i have to pull down my panties, i smell it and find it so hot, which makes me even more excited.
I feel like it's a part of my HS symptoms. Am i alone?

Me 20yoM is considering hiring someone to take my virginity I've never been good with women never had a girlfriend and have a lack of confidence and experience i see my peers with their partner showing intimacy around me I guess I'm just tired of not having any connection or physical intimacy part of me thinks it's a good idea but the other half thinks its wrong and weird I don't know if I should or not I really want to lose my card and have that experience but I also want it to happen more naturally

I’m hoping someone can help me (27F) understand if I might have suffered sexual assault and not remember it:

I started orgasming by pressing my thighs together at around 5 years old
There was a girl in my class and we were bffs at that age and we’d come over to each others houses really often and she would always suggest we play “doctor”. She would touch my genitals and ask that I touch hers.
Idk if it’s bc of this girl and the doctor play but I became very curious about genitals/naked people
I used to draw naked people in my diary from age 5 also
I was quite curious about genitals from really early on - I had a boy neighbour who I asked if we could shower together to his nanny and the nanny said “I don’t think so” and I said “but we’re kids!”, I remember thinking I knew it was wrong but I wanted to see his genitals
This boy and I would be left to play alone and once in my room I said “I’ll show you mine if you show me yours” and we did.
I once slept at my parents bedroom and I remember in the middle of the night I removed all my clothes for some reason. When I woke up, my mum and dad sounded very concerned asking why I was naked and asking it a million times
I also used to orgasm in class by pressing thighs at that age
At age 9 I saw my sister touching my dad’s dick with him laying down in bed. He used to ask us if we wanted to see his dick bc it’s circumcised so for biology class purposes. To this day I’m unsure if he’s autistic or if that was assault.
At 11 I started watching porn bc I stumbled upon it and became obsessed with porn that was pretty much rape fantasy - or that involved really young looking girls
At 14 I caught my mum watching porn and masturbating
At 14 I found my mums sex videos
At 15 I found a photo album my mum had with her boyfriend
At 15 I caught my dad and his wife having sex
At 16 my mum told me she got a dildo as a bday present from a friend of hers

I have ADHD and derealisation. This is due to narcissistic mum abuse but I wonder if it could be bc of anything else that I’ve deleted from my mind?

I consider myself hyper sexual - if i work from home, I masturbate like 6 times a day and it’s disruptive to my work and life and mental health. Is it just the ADHD looking for dopamine or could there be something more? I still have non-consent fantasies

Apparently 5 days ago I posted that I threw out my satisfyer. My main one. Somewhere in the past few days I threw out the other I had and just now my laat sucking and vibrating toy. This has been my goal for years and I finally did it.

I allow myself to keep my wand (which is pretty much broken somehow) since my bf got it and its apparently really expensive and maybe he can somehow fix it?? And a rabbit vibrator and dildo. Maybe in the future I'll throw the vibrators out as well, but for now I've achieved my goals even if it costs multiple relapses.

Toys like these aren't inherently evil, but for me it has made it even easier to relapse and impossible to learn how to satisfy myself otherwise and thus how my bf can. I want to become more attuned to my body and sexuality so I can finally have truly fulfilling sex and this is the way I feel works for me.