Potential pregnancy situation with a provider who disappeared - what would you do?
Looking for some perspective from people who have been around the hobby longer than I have.
I’m married, although my marriage has been essentially sexless for years. Earlier this year I saw a provider I’d seen before, and during one encounter there was a pregnancy risk. It was the only time anything like that happened.
I saw her again a few weeks later and everything seemed completely normal. Nothing was said about pregnancy or any concerns from the previous encounter.
I then took a couple months away from the hobby. Recently I got worried about that encounter again and thought about checking in with her. That’s when I discovered that her ads are gone and her old number no longer works. I haven’t seen any discussion about her recently either.
Obviously there are a hundred innocent explanations for somebody leaving the business or changing numbers, and I don’t want to turn this into an investigation into where she went. I also don’t want to post identifying details about her.
But the uncertainty has gotten into my head.
My main question is: if she were to resurface and tell me she’s pregnant and that I might be the father, how would you handle that situation?
My current thinking is that I wouldn’t argue, accuse her of anything, or make promises. I’d tell her that I understand I’m potentially the father and, if the pregnancy continues, I’d want paternity established through a legitimate DNA test before making decisions based on that assumption. If it established that I was the father, then obviously I’d have to deal with the reality of having a child and everything that comes with that.
And although my marriage has problems, I don't want to lose that.
Part of me wants to ask around locally just to find out whether she’s okay, but I’m hesitant because that could draw unwanted attention to both of us. Posting anonymously somewhere non-local seems less invasive.
For those who have dealt with pregnancy scares or something remotely similar: would you just leave this alone unless she contacts you? Is there anything sensible I should be doing now that I’m overlooking?