r/ClientsAndCompanions

I get this question in my DM’s several times a day from newbie clients:

“How do I find a provider in my city?”

They tell me of their frustrations trying to navigate Tryst and other directory sites, with horror stories of fake profiles, deposit scammers, and OnlyFans models who won’t meet them in person. Throw AI into the mix and they can’t even tell who is an actual human anymore.

With X, FB, and Instagram cracking down on SW it’s getting more difficult to find us on those platforms too.

This might seem like an obvious solution, but sometimes the most obvious solution is the one that gets too often overlooked.

Google is your friend, my dudes.

The best way to find a real human, local companion in your city is to search the web!

For example, when I type in “FBSM sensual massage Oklahoma City,” my official website pops up ranked first in search results.

Providers who are professional and serious have websites, and we know how to do SEO to help you find us in a web search.

Your chances of finding a reliable companion are MUCH better simply searching Google (or your search engine of choice) than wasting your time endlessly scrolling on Tryst, hoping to find someone local, honest, and real.

Of course Google will also bring up escort directory websites in your search results. Avoid those! Most are rabbit holes leading you nowhere.

Look for an actual companion’s official website.

From my own client analytics, 80% of new client inquiries I get come directly from my website, which the client ran across in a Google search.

Only about 10% of my business actually comes through Tryst. The other 10% usually find me on Reddit, BlueSky, Velvet22, or other sites.

Clients, try the simplest solution: Google it!

Providers, don’t sleep on having an official website. Hire a good designer who is an SEO pro. Trust me, it’s worth the investment!

Normally I’m a GFE type of client it’s just to avoid the robotic companions. Even though I’m not big on kissing — the GFE experience is normally more relaxed and just overall enjoyable.

This provider was non - GFE but she was so good a creating chemistry I honestly didn’t notice until I was driving away. There was no kissing, welcoming hug, the business part was taking of in a vert smooth and not obvious way. She smiled, she appeared ready for me, the room was comfortable. She created a welcoming ambiance. If that makes sense. Normally it takes a minute for me complete …but I was so at ease I was like it was a QV lol. Normally I would be like ugh I had all this time left but I was good.

I really attribute this to chemistry. I’ve only had that with one other provider but I always attributed that more so to the GFE experience.

If a client makes a booking but the SW isn’t anything like their photos… what’s the right thing to do?

Hey everyone,

I'm pretty new to this and have actually tried a few times in the past (I've met up with a few providers, but wasn't really able to go anywhere due to be nervous/not having time to develop a connection).

I'm relatively inexperienced sexually and in relationships.

I found a newer provider that I think I am very interested in meeting. But unlike before I'm saving other activities for later and am asking just for drinks for now.

She has one review on TER from an established reviewer (with a whitelist), has a x profile (but hasn't posted since late March), and a legit (actually very nice) standalone profile, I also submitted a deposit.

The only thing is her postings are on sexycourtesan and ladys.one. But perhaps that is ok?

Just wanted to make sure I did my due diligence. Does anyone have any feedback for me? Can LE still sting at the cocktail bar for nothing other than drinks?

How would I know that an SP is “low traffic” - higher rates/fewer days available I guess? And why does that seem to be preferred? I’ve noticed it mentioned a few times on here… is it because people think that there’s more risk for STI transmission if SP’s have more clients? Not sure I align with that thinking as anyone at anytime can have an STI!

Basic facts 

This is a new throwaway account. It might get long… and I may ramble.

I’m a 60+ yo male. Married 35+ years. Married the first woman to sleep with me twice. I was not exactly sexually active before marriage in my mid twenties, except for a few fumbelings as a teenager. 

We have no children. We had a good sex life for 20 years, She had medical issue that took it all away. I won’t get into details. We’ve been in a dead bead room marriage for 17 years of 35 years. 17 years and I can count the number of times we tried on 2 hands. 

We could never get anything right again. No drive, painful, embarrassing. I’m a wall and I know it, and so is she. Then 5 years went by, then 10. Then there’s the weight. She is over twice my weight now. Im a normal sized man but slim. I’m not attracted to her physically at all now, and she’s not attracted to me or anyone as far as I can tell. That’s Just facts. I can’t help it. I truly wish I could. Animosity builds between us. We are roommates. She can’t start a conversation that is not a set of instructions or complaints. I’m not leaving. She’s not leaving. There is not enough space here to get into why I won’t leave. It’s very emotionally complicated and it’s not financial. We don’t talk about it. None of this is her fault. 

——

The rationalization.

I’ve only been sexually active for 22 of the 46 years I should have, or could have been. It’s not good. It’s excruciatingly depressing and the anxiety overwhelms. I’m retired and I’m alone and it’s exhausting. Anger is my constant companion. I hide it best I can. 

I had no idea I could feel this lonely and miserable and desperate for any kind of affection. Not just physical (but mostly I admit) my prostate medication is cialis. My brain stem is always on fire. It’s a hard way to live :)

I’m prone to guilt. So much so that I take on other peoples guilt all the time. I often find myself repeating the the phrase “I didn’t do anything wrong- why do I feel this way” in my head all day long. I feel guilty by default actually, and it’s a lifelong problem.

No friends or family to talk to about anything. Everyone I know and love is tied to her.

I took the long road here but thank goodness i made it through the door back to a life thanks to a kind provider.

I started looking at tryst about 5 (yeah 5years) ago. I would look and look at the same profiles all the time. Some of these ladies have been on tryst in my areas for as long as I’ve been looking which makes picking one easier I think, and I think it’s a good idea to observe for a long time before you decide to make the call. I’m obsessed with profiles of the companions in their 40s through 60s. I love to filter on that age bracket because the pool is smaller, less confusing, and less prone to valgarity, less scammy and seem more professional  generally. I wish there were more older ladies, or ladies that advertise to, and/or accept only old dudes. It’s a real turn on and comforting to see in an ad. Perhaps I’ll get past that at some point. I don’t think I want anyone in there 20s or 30s right now but that might change.

If an ad says “40+ dudes only“ or “older men most welcome” it goes on my mental list.

2 years ago I had the had meeting scheduled out of town with a mature companion I had followed for about 6 months because I knew I would be in her town. . It fell through when she found out I didn’t drink, but that I smoked pot!? She asked while I was on my way, what booze I wanted and I told her I can’t drink. She turned me around while I was on my way to her hotel - I was 1000 miles from home and my date with a hooker fell through on moral grounds. It was quite a setback in my mind and my heart. It was a long 1000 mile drive home. I felt terrible and humiliated.

then Finally!

I finally had a meeting recently with a wonderful mature companion that is always on tour in my area in the summer. She goes south in the winter, during the session I was a total  mess! I was like a 60yo virgin. I was an embarrassing stereotype 100% - I’m absolutely 100% sure I am a terrible everything. I had no idea what to do or how to act. 

And it didn’t matter one bit. I’m easy money.

IT WAS Awesome! And by awesome I mean awesome. Not the sex - I was as fast as a 14yo and his right hand. Awesome as in i finally did it. Finally. I booked 2hrs and left early because I was more than bit overwhelmed by the experience. The provider was very kind to me and I’m scheduled again next month when she rolls around again. I’ll be much more relaxed next time. I felt like a king - like a human.

The point of this post…

My reaction to the experience is what totally shocked me. I felt, and feel absolutely no shame, no guilt about it and I’m really shocked. I expected crushing shame and guilt but I got freedom and relief. And no embarrassment by my own lack of skill and performance, my awkwardness. I’m in my 60s FFS and it’s been 16 damn years. 

The clock is running out on my ability (prostate problems) -This thing will not last forever! Your gonna lose it eventually so use it while it works. Opportunity has been restored and my clock reset. I can do this whenever I friggin want to. Nobody gets to decide this but me. I will compartmentalize this activity and will survive as a result.

I’m back in the human race doing human things with humans. Do not go without for 17 years. Just get it taken care of. Restore yourself and your sanity. Forgive yourself. Get some.

I can’t wait to see her again, and a few more - I will visit 5 ladies this year. 

Thank you B. if you’re out there.

I've been on the fence about seeking a sex worker for a while now. I'm married with kids, and my wife just doesn't have any desire to be intimate anymore. I try to do everything she asks to make her feel better to no avail. The marriage is still good, it's not toxic or anything like that. She just has no desire for intimacy while I do. So I'm at my breaking point.

That being said, how do I maintain as much anonymity as possible with this? Because EVERYTHING is available online now. I've checked my name online and it's actually shocking the kind of information you can find to where I don't understand how it's even legal. I'm worried that all it takes is meeting the wrong provider and I get unexpected texts or visits to my home.

I'd visit a MP, but they seem so janky tbh. I'm looking for a discreet and professional interaction, and the last thing I want is to have to make a call to my wife to come bail me out because I got picked up in a sting operation.

Is there pretty much nothing I can do and it's just a risk that comes with the territory? If so then I guess I'm looking forward to celibacy for the rest of my life -_-

I appreciate any help, thanks

This has happened 3 times now, months after having a session with a provider, their Facebook profile showed up as a "suggested friend". There's no way any of my friends know them and I've never tried to look them up on FB. It's gotta be that "nearby devices" feature that most phones, mine's an Android, have. I'm no creep, so I immediately blocked them and blocked them from seeing me. It's scary. I don't have anyone to hide this from, but I could see a married person with a sudden "suggested friend" showing up and their spouse getting upset.

I am aware that this question has kind of already been answered; the thing is, the responses in those threads (at least from what I can see) don't lead to a single, cohesive conclusion, which is why I’m asking for opinions specifically in the context of my own situation.

Currently, I haven't paid for any escorts. For some time though I’ve been purchasing customs. I have an odd—not necessarily crazy, but strangely specific desire. I won't be explicit with the details; I’ll just say it's content I almost never find online. And when it *does* appear, it's either too short, or it’s combined with extreme shit that I do not enjoy 👎️. So I've been paying creators to fulfill this desire. I’ve had some luck! Others though made dry solos and pretended like they didn't know what I asked for.

I still occasionally buy customs, but a part of me longs to bring this desire to life. For the past few months, I’ve been looking into escorts—for obvious reasons (lack of any IRL community).

But I face another dilemma: I kinda want it to be filmed. Not even for commercial use, just so I can enjoy it later. I’ve search this and another subreddit for answers. SOME have said to just be ready to pay double or more (which I'm 100% okay with). Others, however, say don't even look for escorts and to search for "adult talent agency". It's just that when I search this up for my area I get almost no result, maybe I'm looking on the wrong site?

I genuinely do not mind the cost, I just don't want to make the wrong choice. Do I go for escorts and simply request for it to be filmed, and if so do I ask that at booking or at the date? Or should I go with "adult talent"? Or do I not do either and just keep going for customs?

i don't really know where to post this but i'm panicking a little, two weeks ago i booked an appointment with a SW, it'll be my first time. i immediately quit taking the pill that week so i'd move my period up a little, so i was on my period two weeks ago. now i just checked and i got my period again.. i already paid and it's less than 48 hours away so i can't cancel anymore (it's through an agency, i'm in europe) and i genuinely don't know what to do now. is there anything he won't do now? should i notify the agency already?

I will be meeting with a companion that has agreed to travel to me. I was wondering would it be out of place to reach out a day or two ahead and ask if she would like any snacks or drinks? This will be a multi hour session and she was the first to agree to traveling to me. Yes I am paying extra for the travel but since I had such a hard time finding someone I wanted to be nice and provide something other than the Donation.

Came to ftl/hollywood with intentions of working the net. I’m getting a lot of low offers. I’m still learning the freestyle hustle. Any tips?
BlackF23

I’ll try to keep this as short as I can, but knowing me it’ll probably still turn into a fucking essay… Some time ago I went to an escort to lose my virginity and I couldn’t get it up… I figured it was just a mental block caused by the awkward atmosphere, so a week later I decided to give myself a second chance with another girl and… the exact same shit happened again. Luckily, the second provider was really understanding and didn’t make me feel completely humiliated over my performance issue, so huge props to her for that. If you want more context, you can read my older posts, but basically after that second visit I started thinking this might be more than just anxiety and that I could actually have a real problem… Anyway, I decided to try a different approach. For the last three weeks I haven’t jerked off once and completely quit porn to reset my sex drive as hard as possible. I also found another girl whose ad I really like and I’m planning to see her soon to try for the third time but… yeah. In the back of my mind I still keep thinking the same shit is gonna happen again. Add the stress of meeting a new person and walking into the unknown on top of that and it honestly feels like the perfect recipe for another failure… Today I started wondering if maybe the best thing would be to just assume the ED will happen again and tell the girl about it beforehand in a message, but I have no idea how to bring it up without dumping a whole truckload of bullshit on her right from the start… (I also have a moderate disability that I’d have to mention too.) How do I even approach this without sounding like a giant rant about how fucked up I am? I’m still fully capable of enjoying a session with an escort through stuff like cuddling, talking, kissing etc. and I’m not gonna turn the whole session into some huge dramatic meltdown over ED if it happens again. So I guess my question for the girls is: how problematic are clients like this really? I mean… I could just assume maybe this time things will actually be okay because I genuinely feel positive effects from those three weeks of abstinence, but… what if they’re not? I’d rather not risk it.

Please take it easy on me, im very inexperienced and aware that i might just be being paranoid.

Yesterday i was going through it and decided to try and hire an escort for the first time. I found her on tryst, and did my research, saw she had history of ads, had an onlyfans kind of active, and required a nonrefundable deposit, thats about all i could find about her. Tried to ask her about any other social media but she ignored it and didnt reply to that.

Pretty much the first thing she asked for was the deposit, 100$, didnt think much of it and just sent it to her through zelle which has my full name although i also saw what i assume was her real name. The appointment was made for a few days after at 7pm. We never talked about any explicit acts, however i did mention that im a virgin and very inexperienced and if she was ok with that. She just replied with an "ok baby i just need you to send the deposit to make the appointment". No type of screening whatsoever.

She asked for my nationality, and gave me the address of what i assume is her place to meet at. Skip to now and im freaking out at my impulsiveness. Im thinking of not going to the appointment, the deposit was non refundable but idc about that. All of that happened in less than an hour and im just wondering if i did something stupid, would the cops investigate something like this?

Again, im aware i might just be being paranoid but would appreciate some insight into the situation, thank you.

On vacation alone. Deciding to do this for the first time. Found a provider on Tryst. Rate seemed, reasonable(?) (is 300 for an hour massage about normal?) Found her website, cross referenced TER. Most recent review is from August of last year. She didn't list a TER number herself, but she was on there. Only discrepancy there was the phone number, which she notes on her ads and website has changed recently. Also cross referenced on BlueSky, which seems real enough, though hasn't been active for a month.

I've texted her, have a session time for tomorrow. Gotten to the point she's asking for verification. Presumably then a deposit. Since this is where it actually gets risky I wanted to put this to you guys to confirm there's no obvious reason to back out.

Also wanted to confirm language here. Is a "Sensual Massage" one where I can expect a happy ending? Or just one with really nice visuals?

Like I said. Complete noob to this. Want to make sure I'm not letting the dick do the thinking. My gut feeling right now is this lady is legit.

I’m honestly so tired of guys coming in and complaining to me about other girls “She didn’t look like her photos” “I was disappointed” etc Ok… but you still stayed the whole time? You still booked, stayed and went through with it. So why are you sitting here gossiping to another woman about it? If you had a bad experience, that’s your business, but it’s honestly really UNATTRACTIVE when grown men complain nonstop about other women to me, or come here. It gives bitter energy. You don't like a provider, gather your stuff and leave. Is this how you date in the real world? Geez

At this point, if I hear another man whining about another provider during my session, I’m ending IT immediately. Please keep that negativity somewhere else.

I don’t know why, but even though I know the relationship is purely transactional, I really enjoy it when a provider I had a great session with reaches out with friendly messages saying she’s in my area and asking if I’d like to meet up again. She’s a well-established provider who I’m sure has plenty of clients, so the invitation feels especially nice.

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