u/Ok_babe_00

I have an SD and honestly he’s pretty good when it comes to spoiling me, but he almost never gives cash directly. It’s usually gifts, shopping, vouchers, food deliveries, and other stuff like that.

I’m not exactly complaining because he does spend money on me, but sometimes I wonder if this is normal in SR's or not. Most arrangements I see online talk about allowances or ppm, so now I’m curious how common this type of arrangement actually is.

Do SDs just prefer gifting over cash, or this simply a sign that they’re avoiding real financial support?

I finally talked to him properly and asked him straight up what he actually wants. He said he’s not into anything sexual at all and denied any incest stuff. He just wants a close bond where he feels appreciated in a “dad” role.

Apparently he has a stepdaughter he really cares about, but she treats him like shit and barely talks to him without being rude. So this kinda feels like he’s trying to fill that gap.

What he explained is basically: I just share stuff from my life, talk to him normally, and sometimes ask for money in a casual way (like “hey dad I saw this dress, can you send me money?”). And in return I just be sweet, appreciative, keep him updated about my life, etc. In return he wants to take care of me as a loving dad.

There's No pressure, no weird demands (for now at least). The part that’s throwing me off: He’s already sent me like $XXX in gift cards in just a week (You know I can't mention numbers here). Hasn’t asked for anything sexual

The whole thing feels more emotional than anything else And idk… I actually felt kinda bad for him. It seems like he’s just looking for the kind of appreciation he never got from his own family.

So a 64-year-old man approached me online. For the first couple of days, everything felt pretty normal we talked a lot about our interests, family, lifestyle, etc. Honestly, the conversation was flowing well. He was the one who brought up sugaring. I told him I don’t mind a sugar relationship, but since we live in different countries, I asked if he’d be okay with the distance. After that, he ghosted me for a whole day. Then he came back and said “Distance won’t be an issue. I’ll manage everything for you, take care of everything… it’s just a plane ride. I really like you and would love to spoil you—but not as a sugar daddy, as a real dad. I want a spoiled, bratty daughter to call mine.” That part really threw me off. I told him I need time to think about it, but now I’m honestly confused. I can’t figure out what he actually wants. Part of me feels like he sounds genuine, but another part of me thinks this could get really creepy later.

(For context, I’m 20)

Has anyone dealt with something like this before? What would you do in my situation?