u/ParfaitSlight9640

I've been making a lot of progress in accepting I'm a gainer. First, I talked it in therapy and it helped me confirm it's not twisted or wrong, it's just a different sexuality. Then, I chose to tell my friends, because all of them are body positive people and they don't judge people just bc they're unusual. They are all queer and neurodivergent, so I knew they wouldn't tell me it's disgusting or something.

I planned a lot what to tell them, and if anything I wish I had gone for a more gradual coming out process. I wrote a long message explaining everything, which is fine (specially since at that time I needed to feel understood), but perhaps it would've been better if I had started by saying something like "ykw? I never felt afraid of being fat". After a few weeks saying that I find fat people very attractive, and finally the coming out message. But it was fine, they all reacted with respect.

Time went on, and I kept seeing gainer content and planning my gaining process (I need a good job ASAP, new clothes are expensive for a poor student :c ). But after some time, I needed to keep talking to someone. So I tried feabie, and a few posts for chatting on this sub. It didn't work, people just stopped texting. My best friend also has a weird kink, so we joke about both our kinks and that's been helping.

The other week, a friend told me about an app that gives coupons for free food after a certain amount of steps, so I replied "Oh, you gain back all of what you lost? I like it haha!" They paused for a second and then kept talking. This friend in particular hasn't asked anything about my kink, and I know they won't. It's fine, I know being respected already is a privilege. But I still wish I could talk more about this.

It's not just a preference, it's an identity. It's a part of my life, and it will only become more important for me. So it's sad to just act as if it wasn't important