I've (44) been with my BF (46) for 4 yrs. Like most relationships our sex life in the beginning was very regular. Having sex about twice a week due to our work schedules. Over time the frequency died down a bit. Maybe once every other week. Frequency was never an issue, just offering context in case relevant.
The issue is porn during sex. In the beginning of the relationship we never used porn to help him climax. However during the last year or so he has come to rely on it more and more. Initially it was just to get into the mood and once erect, he didn't need it and we'd continue love making with video assistance. Now it's gotten to the point where he's unable to climax most of the time without it as a visual stimulus. It made me incredibly insecure. Was I not enough now? Does he not find me attractive now that I'm a bit older? He insists he finds me beautiful. He's always grabbing onto me affectionately and playfully. He even initiates most of the time. So what gives? I want to ask why has porn become an integral part of the bedroom ovythe years but I'm terrified of the truth.
Fyi I have never had an issue with a partner watching porn with or without me being present. I watch it solo myself.