I've been on various dating apps for 4 years now and I've never had any luck. I rarely match with anyone and even when I do they always end up ghosting me almost immediately. That's why I was thrilled a few days ago when I matched with the seemingly perfect woman on Facebook Dating and we started having a nice conversation over Facebook Dating's message feature.
However she stopped responding to me after a day or two and I figured she’d ghosted me just like everyone else. I was really upset and disappointed by this but then yesterday I got another text from her saying that “unfortunately” she thinks the age gap between us is too large (she’s 19 and I’m 31) and that she’s “uncomfortable” with it, but that I’m “very nice” and seem “really cool”. I asked her if she still wants to be friends but I still haven’t gotten a response from her and I’m guessing the answer to that is also no.
What bothers me so much about this, aside from her seeming nearly perfect for me except for this one major thing, is that she must’ve seen my age when she matched with me because it’s right beside the person’s name on every profile, and didn’t seem to have a problem with it then. So what I’m guessing happened is that she talked it over with some woke Gen Z feminist friends of hers and they probably told her not to date me because I’d “(word I can’t say here)” her or whatever.
I’m glad she at least had the decency not to ghost me like everyone else and that she even still had nice things to say about me, but she shouldn’t have to feel this way about the prospect of dating someone significantly older than her and it’s a huge shame that she and so many other young people these days feel the need to reject older people even when the feeling is mutual, merely due to societal stigma.
This whole incident has been heartbreaking and infuriating for me, especially as someone who’s had zero luck with women thus far and is losing patience with the pursuit of it all, and yet ultimately it only strengthens my resolve. I’ve hated and spoken out against AGR hysteria both irl and on social media for years now but now that I’ve been personally hurt by this hysteria (and really badly, mind you) it only makes me more determined to become an advocate for the acceptance of AGRs and to become the older partner in an AGR of my own.
I’m still open to dating someone my age or perhaps even a bit older but honestly, the younger the better (within legality, of course). If I can find someone who’s 18 or 19 I’ll be over the goddamn moon. The problem for me with Gen Z is that they’re the generation I’m mainly attracted to but they’re also the ones most virulently opposed to AGRs, because it’s “woke” to hate people of different ages being in love with each other or whatever.
So in short, I’m determined to date a college aged woman and to fight for the acceptance of people my age and older doing so.