tldr: I was horny and I wanted a thrill so I put myself in a dangerous situation and got raped.

backstory

Few weeks ago my friend and I went club hopping.

One guy started talking to me then once my friend approached he made a comment about her tits. We walked away and I heard him yell “tell her to come suck my dick.”

Later a group of guys started following us and one of them asked which one of us gives better head. Anyways the night was about what you would expect from guys. They were just bothering us all night long so we had fun and went home.

We were both annoyed at the time but later i thought it was kinda hot and I got turned on by the thought of them saying those things.

what happened

Next weekend I went club hopping alone.

I didn’t really know what to expect tbh. I got drunk and had some fun. Then I stood outside for a bit, talked dirty with some guys. One guy asked if I wanted to go home with him. I was pretty drunk, I think I said I wanted to get food first but we got in his car and we talked a bit and I drifted off to sleep.

I woke up not long after and asked if we were at my place or his. We were at his place.

He led me inside and I almost fell asleep again when I felt him touching me and taking off my clothes. I stopped him and said I didn’t wanna have sex. He said he was just taking my clothes off and he wouldn’t do anything I’m not comfortable with and I told him to just let me sleep.

He left briefly then came back and completely ignored everything I said. He got on top of me and pinned me down with his weight and went in my pussy. It was really rough, he was pulling my hair and grabbing my throat, just doing whatever he wanted. At first I didn’t feel it because I was so drunk but as I sobered up more I realized I was being raped. I started crying out of frustration and felt like I was just letting him do it because I didn’t know what else to do. He came in me and left my neck and face bruised from holding me down and kissing and just being rough.

After he was done I put my clothes back on and as I was about to leave he came back and grabbed my hair again and pushed me down on my knees and made me suck him. He also forced me to say "thank you for the best night of my life” which I said reluctantly.

My face looked like a mess and my pussy and chest were also red. I think I still have the pics. I didn’t end up reporting him tho. It was all so confusing and I felt like a total idiot for putting myself in that situation. I felt gross for just letting it happen.

I’ve had sex before and I’ve had a few bad ones but this was different. I decided to post this here because this doesn’t feel appropriate for other rape subreddits. This happened several months ago and I still think about it often so it feels more appropriate here.