(27f) struggling financially after quitting dancing for my bf (35m)
To give context on my career:
I have been dancing on and off since I was 20. I was a hairdresser and nail tech beforehand and started to dance in order to save money to invest in property and stocks. I do not come from a family that has money so I did feel at the time university would not be the best option, and trades was my calling- I truly was trying to invest and gain capital quickly so that was my motive.
During covid I went to school for real estate because I didnt want to be stuck dancing forever. I didnt pass the exam- decided to move provinces, took the real estate course for that province and passed. I am now a licensed realtor, but ofcourse the income is not consistent right away. It does take some time to build a clientel and have enough consistent transactions to pay bills. So, I continued to dance on the weekends.
I have been single for 5 years- I've been extrememly selective because I value a man who is emotionally intelligent, caring, stable, smart funny- all the things one wants and I was willing to hold off until I found a man that is well rounded and mature. I feel like I finally found that a little over 3 months ago. We really hit it off but when I told him I dance he essentially gave me an ultimatum. Given how much I like him I quit dancing, he agreed to give me enough money to cover rent and my other bills in the meantime which is nice but would mean every other daily cost I have would be coming out of my savings. I tapered down on dancing as soon as I met him because I saw he was hurting and I do understand it's hard to feel good about your girlfriend being seen in that way by other men.
I've lost a lot of money since knowing him, and since he agreed last month to pay my bills I havent worked a day at the club. I have no income coming in at the moment and he hasn't upheld his end of the deal- I know money is tight for him right now due to outside factors, he promised he'll give it to me but this all has taken a huge toll on me. I am going broke in order to have a boyfriend. I really like him, but I am asking myself whether this is sustainable- if he can't help and he wont be with me if I dance how are we supposed to last? Will these months of no income be for nothing? And is it even fair at all for him to ask me to quit my job in the first place?
Please help..
FYI, I am trying to get a part time job, I just haven't found one yet.