u/Top-Distance-6205

He's straight and not the brightest mind out there. He believes that women want very particular things from men like a checklist. I don't have that list but I don't believe he checks anything.

We're two gay colleagues at work and we hung around a lot. Some people may assume we're having something sexual but we're having a bromance at best, nothing sexual.

He says that we look "normal" and he can't understand how we can find each other and other men attractive. We told him he doesn't have to be gay to understand that two people can be mutually attracted. I also told him that despite that I'm gay, beauty has no gender. I may look at a woman and think that she's very beautiful. This doesn't mean I'm sexually attracted to her. He says he can't do that with men and that true men don't look other men.

He also said that it's a good thing we're gay because this means more women for him. He asked us if we're into him and my friend answered "heaven forbid". He got offended lmao.

A bonus thing: he asked a female colleague if she'd prefer me (or my friend) or him. She said any of us (me and my friend). They are cute, kind, have a stable job and make me laugh. I can oversee that they are not into women. But your face? I can't oversee this even if I was blind.

But seriously now, why some men "struggle" to just accept that some men are into other men. I mean is it so difficult?

He's a chronic crush of mine. I really don't know why. It's just what when I saw I fell in love. I have 0 hopes about something happening in between us.

He created an IG profile now and sent me a request. A jolt of dopamine went down my spine and then he liked a story I had posted.

I spent an evening being super energetic and happy. I had one of my best trainings at the gym. So I wonder, is it good that this affected me that much?

I have a tiny crush with an older coworer. I won't get into details but we work in the same hospital, he's the director of a department (physician), I'm also a physician but of a different department. So although I do respect him and I value him our paths don't really cross.

We started to have an IG interaction. I was quite scared because I didn't know if he was gay, I worried if he could out me but I was as silly and ethusiastic as ever.

It turned out well though. I think we had two months of dinners prior to someone making a step. We slept together without having sex. And at some point in the middle of the night I woke up horny beyond words can describe and I just grabbed him and started to kiss him and all. That night I fucked him, I was kinda rough with him and slapped him during sex.

I've never done this in my life, now I worry he thinks I'm a dom top or something while in fact I'm the definition of a versatile guy who loves other guy and who was always cuddly and cute. I feel like he expects our next time to be like that and it stresses me a lot.

(I also feel terribly ashamed when I see him at work but this is kinda irrelevant)

My buddy and I love huffing together. We watch a trainer, I jerk off both dicks and he gives us the hits.

We usually do highrise and sometimes we add a second paper. I tell him to give me double barell but it's a bit time consuming to screw and unscrew all this bottles lmao.

We hold some hits, we get fucked up and we end up cumming and lying on our backs dizzy. It's amazing.

Can we make it more intese somehow? I mean the hits to feel stronger, maybe do more double barells? sock method?

I mean now it's the obvious thing to be. I can't imagine of a pop singer being openly homophobic. I guess it's part of the "how to be" advice they receive.

but back then? which singers dared to be gay friendly before it was cool?

Sometimes I believe that there is something in his brain that inhibits human logic.

He's a religious person and he's devoted his life in doing good to others. He's studying religious texts, he's helping with the church and blah blah. The only thing that makes him furious is seeing a gay person.

According to his belief, being gay is a sin, the devil somehow makes people gay. He views them as demonized (does that word exist?)

At some point I couldn't take it any longer. I told him that I know he's gay and he should stop punishing himself. He said all this charity he does is his penance for being gay.

He believes that if he embraces his sexuality he will gain weight, he will become purple haired and he will transition to being a woman. It's like his brain absorbs whatever extreme is shown and projects it as his future.

I suggests him seeing a mental health expert but he denies it because he believes only a priest can guide you.

He's a very good person and I really love him and all this saddens me. I just wish his medieval thoughts vanish. I've met religious gay people and they were absolutrely happy. They didn't self isolate watching their life flow away in fear of being taken over by lust.

He's a special to me. He served both as a friend and a mentor. He made me want to be better and better by leading the example. He was also gay friendly, cared about meeting my bf and was very supportive.

There are definitely some weird things about him which I don't mind at all, I think it's what makes him who he is. And I always believed that these differences of him made him more accepting towards non straight people. For instance, he's terrible at eye contact, he won't make a hand shake, nope not ever. He may be standing right next to you and text you hello. He can be too honest without realizing that. Anyway

There was a type of elections (I won't get into details) but he was a candidate with a party that was quite homophobic. The leader of that party is homophobia incarnate.

I was shocked to find out this. I just told him that I really can't tolerate my friend to be part of that thing that is against gay (and other people) rights. I don't remember my exact wording but I told him that he can choose whatever he wants in my life but I won't be having homophobic friends. So this is a goodbye.

Now I found out that he quit the party (I heard that this happened) and I really don't know what to do.

A dear friend of mine (gay) has a very close (friendly) relationship with a single mom. They are friends for about a decade. He's closeted and has a relationship with another man for many years.

My friend is handsome and full of life. He goes to vacations with his bf.

She has never wondered why he never had a gf or a bf. And that's what pissed me off. He said he does that out of being discreet. But if you truly claim yourself to be somebody's very close friend like she does, you would have wanted to know this.

Can it be awkward? Sure. But a true friend will understand that you ask out of interest alone.

I believe that she's just homophobic. She prefers to pretend that she doesn't know. He has our friend helping her because every now and then a catastrophe happens in her life but it's always one way. She discusses her love matters with him but she never, never cared about what's going on to his life.

So correct me if I'm wrong or if you believe otherwise, but she's a bloody selfish person.

I mean being gay it's basically being attracted to men. But this doesn't happen in one day that you are a kid and the next day you are a gay adult.

I started to like men/boys when I was quite young. I knew I was supposed to get married before my sexual instinct awakened. I was just a kid and I knew that the way things develop is "become a grown up, get a wife, have kids". I didn't know what sex was, I just knew you have it to have kids.

When I realized I was a gay teen it was shocking. All these bad things that I've heard people say about gays were now concerning me. It wasn't something bad for a stranger, but for me.

Why don't they realize that their sons and daughters may be gay?

We have a dude at work who could be used as the true homophobic archetype. Middle aged man, with no taste of fashion who hates gays because a) we turn innocent population gay b) we are responsible for low birth rate c) we are abnormal people d) we offend his masculinity

I have another gay colleague with whom we're friends. He says that we can't be boyfriends (the homophobic dude) because gays repel (!) each other. We want true men.

My friend says that it's no use talking to him, it's like teaching a fish how to fly.

I think he also hates us because we hung around with two with two of the hottest female colleagues and everybody enjoys it because we're there for fun not to date.

He told me he knows being gay is wrong and it's a sin and he doesn't want to stand next to sick people.

I can't help but wonder though, what fuels such hatred?

I feel like I'm talking to wall. They say "we don't care what you do to your bedroom". But a boyfriend is not a dildo hidden somewhere in the bedroom. A bf is a lover, you go out with him, you walk with him, you live your life with him.

They have the audacity to say that we gay people want to turn straight people gay. Are they freakin nuts? Straight people have spent centuries trying to eradicate gay people with executions, social isolation, laws, even "treatments" and yet a drag queen's energy will never drain. Sexuality won't change.

they say "aww our kids will see a gay kiss and they will become gay". How many kisses have I seen in all those movies as a kid and didn't turn straight? I saw a couple (gay) kissing on an island as a kid and I think this was when my adolescence commenced. I felt lust for the first time.

And no I won't apologize or defend every single person on the pride for whatever they have said or done. Just as a straight person won't do this for any straight person on the planet.

What fuels their hatred?

PS1: don't like the term -phobic because it's inaccurate. Phobia means fear in greek. They're not scared of us, they hate us.

PS2: they slayed so many people in the ancient times, eradicated the knowledge of ancient greece, replaced our gods with Christianity that says everybody is a sinner, and now gay se is against our culture. Honey we had symposia fucking men before catering was a thing.

I mean gays were gay before it was cool. Male to male attraction happened before religios happened, before today's countries, before even people learned how to grab tools to write.

And now suddently we have people claiming that their god or their tradition is against that.

What's hilarious is that greek people dare to say that being gay is against our tradition when we nearly invented gay sex.

Aren't they drowning in their sea of ignorance?

I've got no actual reason to believe he is gay. On the contrary, I believe he is straight. He was married with a woman and now he's having another relationship with a woman.

He makes gay jokes all the time and he makes jokes about having gay sex. Sometimes this is kinda annoying but most of the stuff like him as a person.

He makes handshakes with every man, he hugs male colleagues, he may kiss you on the cheek, he makes jokes about prostate orgasms and many others.

He takes good care of his looks and he takes protein supplementation. He has even kissed me on my neck.

But there's the thing. If he just likes to get touchy with me, I honestly don't mind. But I believe that this is either done to flatter or whatever (not me specifically but everyone) or uses it as a cover to also be touchy with women (where I believe he's attracted to).

I don't know which is the question here. Maybe it boils down to: is he a fraud or does he just make these silly jokes and funny touching thing?

She's not exactly a friend but she's more than someone that I just know. She's okay with me being gay, she will ask about my bf when I have one and she's very friendly with them.

But here's the big issue. Her bf is a homophobic asshole that actively despises gay people. He says that it's again his religion (Christian) and that this is abnormal and that we're trying to turn people. He says that many gay people have tried to make him gay.

At some point I couldn't take it anymore and told him that I hope the next gay person tries to make him less of an asshole.

My "friend" is like that he has the right to have his own opinion. I told her that hatred is not a opinion it's hatred and I'm not gonna stick around somebody who thinks so may bad things about me just because I'm gay. She says that I'm acting childish. I'm pissed.

I'm fully capable of falling in love. It happens to me repeatedly in real life. But inside an app? No. I can't explain why.

Apart from a tiny minority I feel like I'm interacting with:

a) fakers/scammers with stolen photos

b) eternal users that started having romeo at 2009 and haven't changed their profile photo since. Ironically, why an older profile tends to be safer in terms of being a fake profile it's also kinda worryng. I mean a 20 years old profile is an adult lmao. Nobody managed to make those people delete their profile for 20 years in a row?

c) Some married people who still live in the 80s and look to meet a twink without even sending a picture of themselves.

d) Some always busy and unavailable forgotten divas

I've been thinking of getting one far too long. I think from when I was 16 and now I'm double this age. I'm too much of a coward. I believe that I will get a nasty infection despite doing my best to give it its proper care. I also worry it will get caught on fabric or that it will be a no-go for my work outs.

Anyway..what's your opinion about this piercing?

I don't remember if there was a tiny sub plot somewhere, but other than something that I don't remember, there was no gay presence there.

And despite that it's considered a very popular show in gay audiences. At first I thought maybe the directors/writers didn't feel like a gay character would fit. But honestly, I just believe it was mostly a decision that a gay character may hurt the sponsors.

I've had many women hear to my personal issues that I wanted to share. Same with gay men. I only had a single straight guy hear what I had to say. It was obvious that he couldn't really understand how I felt and how it worked but he was there for me and did his best. And frankly, I needed nothing more than that.

I was thinking that if we are truly more accepted in today's society we should't self ghetto ourselves. We should be able to discuss our romantic issues with straight friends as well.

So I wonder, have you managed that?

And I'm not looking for a super liberal, gender fluid friend. I'm looking for a boring straight pal who wants a wife and kids.

We met during our university years, at some point we worked at the same hospital the three of us. Two of us are gay and the third dude is straight.

The other gay person is very sweet, we never had sex but we cuddle often. He's like a super cuddly bestie. We're like a couple minus the sex.

The weird thing is with the straight dude. We're not secretly in love with him or whatever. He tends to be nasty with people. It sounds crazy but we started to become friends when he was bersek a colleague and I decided that enough is enough.

I told him terrible things that he's an egomaniac narcissist that he couldn't spell the word please even if his life depended on it. Ironically, I believe this and he believe this for himself.

The three of us hang around a lot, dinners, movies, sleep overs etc. We're around 30 years old all o us. I asked him since he is straight and basically an arrogant dude that everybody is inferior to him, what joy does he find in this. He said somebody has to do the dirty job of being mean and that caring for somebody feels nice, even if it's about pets (and yes he did call us pets lmao).

But I still don't see why,

I mean somebody say keep your personal life private, but is your sexual attraction that personal? Because most people when they look a man or a woman they don't think [sexuality unknown] they mostly think straight unless proven otherwise.

I'm sick and tired of being the mysterious guy who never talks about whether he has or has not a bf or a gf.

Many people are surprised. They think that since I'm gay I have to look in a particular gay, not having the straight phenotype. Thing is I'm a boring person for what they think a gay person does. I don't wear a G string, I don't do drugs, I don't hook up with strangers at gay bars every day. I don't do whatever fucked up stereotype they have in their hollow minds.

I'm just a man who likes gym, anime, who repeatedly falls in love with straight guys and who wants "adventure in the great wild somewhere"

Some people gossip me behind my back. Others call me faggot on my face. One called me frigid bitch. I had to report him to the HR because I can be a freaking bitch and I had to defend my title.

But what do you think? Should one's sexuality be disclosed if the person wants to? Because when we talk about partners, when we have gatherings, I want my bf to be welcome.