sugaring with "limitations" (tattoos, weight, etc)
i'm getting back into the lifestyle, slowly but surely, after many years. i'm grateful for the experience so far in trying to get back into it as my previous attempts were met with failure because i was young (18) and misguided. now at 29 (a little too old for some of these men but hey), i feel smarter and probably the most confident i've felt in general but especially in sugaring.
it is hard, however, when you feel confident and unfortunately, you're at a point where you understand the depth of your limitations in sugaring.
i'm a black woman and yes, many people says it doesn't matter but it does, absolutely. i have always known it'd be different for me and i accepted that but everything sort of adds up. in my years of non sugaring (and not thinking i'd ever go back), i got tattoos, i lost weight and put some back on and i've lived life how i wanted which is how it should always be. but it's not a secret that looking the way i do is a point deducted from a lot of SD's. or, worse and most common, i'm just viewed as inherently trashy. so men approach me just for sex or the idea of that i'd be easy to get in bed with and it goes nowhere because i won't have sex unless i'm committed.
currently trying to upgrade my wardrobe, little by little. trying to wear modest clothes that reflect my style (which is hard when you're tall, curvy and it's getting close to summer 😭). i'm keeping my hairstyles long and natural colors (been doing that for years now), and trying to style them in the ways i find most flattering and feminine. with weight, i know there are SD's that don't mind plus size girls but a lot of them do want someone who is slim and active. i've been wanting to get into pilates and yoga, it just all takes time.
anyways, i'm not saying anything surprising or something no one knows. it's just hard having to work twice as hard + all the internal stuff that comes with that. it's a challenge i've been enjoying while simultaneously a little soul crushing at the moment because to be hyper aware of how you're perceived constantly is potential ego death lol.