Potential first time for wife - is this a bad idea? French countryside lover
My wife and I are in our early 30s. Been together now for almost 10 years.
Since early on we have dabbled and discussed non monogamy fairly openly. When we first dated she had a FWB that she kept seeing while we dated. She was young and still wanting to explore her options. I am more of a serial monogamist so I really wanted a girlfriend. It was slightly awkward until he moved away and we became fully exclusive.
The whole experience sort of opened the door to talking about other men and her openly admitting she fantasizes about my friends or strangers.
Since then tho nothing has really happened. We got close a couple times especially on vacation and she went on dates with a couple men and kissed and even sent a guy nudes but never went further. We both got busy with work and sort of dropped it for a couple years.
However this year an old coworker of hers resurfaced. He’s someone she used to hangout with and they were flirty. Something probably couldn’t have happened but the work situation made it too messy. He’s also older in his later 40s and single.
He now lives back in his home country of France. He’s started and owns a b&b in the country. It sounds beautiful. He’s shown my wife photos. My wife is also European and usually visits family over the summer so after he found that out he invited her to stay with him for a week.
She asked me to go. I can’t due to a new job. But she said she still wants to go.
We talked more about it and she was a little shy but she finally admitted if it feels right she would like to have sex with him.
This unbelievably hot and it does seem like it could actually happen this time. The time is there. She will be alone with a man she’s attracted to. He’s into her too. There has been sexual tension for years.
However I do read on this sub quite often and this seems like a bit of an orange flag. She will be alone for an extended period of time. She is a romantic and part of our past discussions is for her to have good sex she wants lots of kissing, passion and basically him to be a lover. She told me he has this big stand alone bathtub and she has been imagining them bathing together. That makes my stomach flip a bit but it’s also so exciting for her and I can tell she’s very much into it but doesn’t want to push it too hard for me.
I am leaning towards saying yes go for it. Is there anything I’m missing here. Is this too risky for her first time or should I trust my gut which says trust her and let her have fun. What should I be asking her or preparing for. The basics are covered.