I [37] think I'm in love with my son [22]
I think I'm in love with my son. I've been a single mother to my now 22 year old son. It's always just been us and I'd like to think I've done everything in my power to be a good mom to him.
My son has grown into a fine young man. Maybe a bit rough around the edges as he hasn't always made the best decisions. He was a bit troubled in his adolescence but what teenager isn't a little rebellious? He's always been very gentle and sweet to me, at the very least. And since becoming a man, he's stepped up a lot around the house with yard work and other household maintenance.
And I guess this is where it all started. It's been a particularly hot summer and he's been doing a lot more yardwork for me. A few days ago he was helping out by mowing the lawn and doing some work in the garden for me while I did some indoor chores. I had taken a break to bring out some water for him and to check on the work he'd been doing. And I don't really know what it was about that moment, but it felt like I was suddenly seeing my son in a new way. He looked so handsome while he focused on his work; shirtless and covered in a sheen of sweat. I couldn't help but watch him for a moment nor could I help the wetness between my legs. It felt so embarrassing and shameful to be looking at my son that way.
Thankfully, I was able to ignore it and push it down.
But then, last night, I couldn't help but think about him again. It started out innocent enough, just reflecting on all the work he'd been doing for us. But soon enough, I was picturing him shirtless. I was picturing him looking at me with hunger and want. It made me so wet. I couldn't help but touch myself to the thought of him taking me. I couldn't help but wonder what his cock might feel like inside of me. I feel so embarrassed. I'm not usually like this. But this ache I have, it won't go away.
I feel so much shame. I don't know what to do. Do you think I'm a bad mother?