u/_Broken_doll

I just recently turned 19, my father died when i was very young, my mother got married 3 years ago again.

My stepfather is a normal guy, I can’t tell if he would go for it or not, but then again I have never met a man who didn’t want me.

I often fantasize about him and his friends forcing me into it when they have a gathering at our house, I think of him slamming me on a table and having his way with me. I need it to be forceful and painful!!!

This would probably break my mom’s heart but she doesn’t need to know, I’d let my stepfather abuse me in any way any how with how many more people he wants to do it with.

What should I do?..

I think my absolute need to be used like an object and beat up stems from the abuse I took when I was young, I was molested brutally by my uncle every day for a year and it left me with a huge need for all of you to treat me the same way, so teach me, I’m genuinely curious..