u/arjeidi

Looking for a long-term discreet playmate. I use the term playmate but really a solid fwb/relationship is ideal. I'm 42, from US and living in Philippines with my wife. We're ENM and it's hard to find local kinky people, so I turn to reddit (regrets?).

As a Dom I do best with a sub who needs structure but also mentoring, support, and guidance. I have a friendly fatherly nature (not a "Daddy") and love to bond outside of kink as well. I've had some previous D/s dynamics the past 8 years and it's something that's a need for me, so I'm looking for stability, long-term. Since I'm ENM we don't need to be exclusive, so if you've got an itch for this kind of relationship, reach out.

My kinks are (ranked highest to lowest): Control (flexible wardrobe, orgasm, & speech control), rules & routines, mental & emotional exploration, affectionate degradation, stocking & pantyhose fetish (on my partners), edging (giving & receiving), joi (giving), light bondage, outercourse, light pain, pet play, body writing, free use

Limits? For sure: scat, blood, weapons, drugs, puke, age play, age regression, bare feet, scars, wounds, illegal activity

I've got the "patient and calm" vibes. Variety of interests, and generally I just love variety & diversity. Ice hockey, games, logic puzzles & sudoku, animals, muuuuusic <3 , reading books (occasionally). I literally have conversations for my job so I'm up for talking about anything and I'm always curious to learn new things. I'm a good teacher and happy to answer any questions. DMing me does not commit you to anything but you better be able to maintain a conversation if you wanna chat

I love control, whether it's outfits, orgasms, your masturbation, or your speech, I love having that control. I'm hoping to find a partner who aches to surrender control in those areas or maybe even identifies as a puppy. Do you feel like you would be better off giving up some control, being trained, being played with in a long-term relationship?

I believe in positive reinforcement so I prefer praising and rewarding excellent behavior than punishing bad behavior but a puppy's gotta learn, doesn't she? The best doll/puppy for me will commit to a dynamic once we've reached the same page in terms of kinks & limits. She'll dress up for me in private moments, obey the rules and instructions I give her, touch herself only when and how I permit, and be capable of having an affectionate and intimate relationship that isn't only sexual. Oh, and occasional voice/phone calls are a must. Schedules can be tight so they're not expected every day but once or twice a week is ideal.

Brats who enjoy "funishments" and misbehaving to push their Doms are not a good match. Brats who are obedient but will sass my ass with banter are welcome.

My kinks: Control (wardrobe, orgasm, speech), nurturing degradation & humiliation, emotional & psychological exploration, toys, pet play, rules & protocol, tasks & games, affection, edging, light bondage, light pain, bodywriting, and free use. Not all need to be included in our relationship, but most should.

Hard limits: scat, blood, weapons, drugs, puke, ageplay, bare feet, scars, wounds, illegal activity, animals,