u/banananectar

y’all aren’t kidding when you say pleasers have gone to shit. i fell in the club, which is embarrassing enough on its own, and completely decimated one of my fucking shoes. the sole came completely detached from the platform and the heel broke in half. it was like my third time wearing them too. then i put on another pair of shoes and while i was giving a lap dance i heard my shoe pop. checked them and BOTH of the soles are becoming detached from the platforms. they’re only a month or two old and i didn’t even do anything that time??? what the actual fuck is happening

i have a deep voice and a mullet (got it before i became a stripper lol), so i naturally lean more androgynous. considering we need to appeal to the heterosexual male gaze, i’ve always fought this and tried to appear more feminine. i always wore my hair up to hide the mullet, chose a very feminine name, do full glam gyaru makeup, etc. my last couple shifts, i left the mullet down and did more simple makeup, and i actually got compliments on my hair from the other dancers! i’m also looking to change my name, and am considering a more androgynous one, specifically dakota. i’m already an alt girlie, so i don’t fit the barbie mold anyway. should i lean into my natural androgyny, or keep fighting to appear more stereotypically feminine? obviously i would still wear makeup, have my nails done, and wear sexy outfits and pleasers, but i’m wondering if a more androgynous name and hairstyle would hurt my money. i suppose i could always try it out and switch up my look depending on how i’d do, but figured i’d ask for input before committing

just wondering if any others here have gotten a bisalp and can give me an idea on when i’ll be able to go back to work after my surgery this friday. i know most people say they went back to work in 1-2 weeks, but they usually work an office job or something like that and don’t have to worry about walking in 8 inch heels, spinning on the pole, and giving lap dances lmao

background: i’m AFAB nonbinary and was on testosterone for about a year and a half, so my voice is deeper than the average cis woman’s. that’s literally the only “clocky” thing about me though, as far as i can tell. i’ve been off testosterone long enough that my body fat has redistributed back to my pre-t female body, i had a full face of makeup on and hair extensions in, i was wearing a microbikini, i’m not super flat chested, literally everything about me screamed “woman” other than my voice. the best way i can describe how i sound is that my voice generally passes as a deep female voice, and sometimes men even say it’s sexy (i’ve gotten compliments on my voice while doing phone sex and camming), but i occasionally do get called “sir” over the phone.

apparently my voice is deep enough that girls at the club got suspicious of me being a trans woman. first the manager who hired me pulled me aside and asked if i’m “fully female,” and thankfully took my word when i said yes. but later another senior coworker pulled me into the bathroom and asked to see my pussy to prove i’m not trans :’) and i did it because i felt like i had no choice. feels kinda like sexual assault or coercion at the very least but i don’t have a therapist to process that with right now LMAO.

i’m not offended by people assuming i’m a trans woman. i’m sad and angry that we live in such a transphobic world that this happened to me, and that the only protection i had in that moment was the fact that i could actually prove i wasn’t a trans woman, and that my trans sisters don’t have that safety if they get clocked. and yet cis people have the audacity to call us the sexual deviants and predators just for existing.

side note: i fell and ate shit in my heels front of the hiring manager on my way to the stage to audition then lost a nail mid audition (still got the job tho???). then got kinda tipsy and was so unstable in my heels that one of the other strippers made me change out of them into my normal boots. also only made $4. planning on going in tonight and praying it goes better 😁