u/bigbootymary

Wasn't the whole point of her spell to make me more adventurous and more willing to see the city? I'm picking up the language so quickly too.

I know she was mad about the kiss but I saw her checking out other guys at the pool and didn't get angry with her. And Raul bought us soooo many drinks last night, two dances didn't feel like enough of a thank you. I don't understand, I'm just trying to have fun like she wanted!

It's not like you're doing any good trying to remember the wish or what you even wished on. I'm not blaming you... for that. Those details of the future, I mean present, are fuzzy for me too.

But you know what's clear as day? That you're going to owe me forever for this. More than you can even imagine. Because never in a million years did I, a guy, think I'd ever be giving birth to my best friend.

I just wanted some tips and tools to help me with all the laundry and chores, not to be the one responsible for all of it! And the stupid boxes make me so... I don't know how to explain it, but when I just feel euphoric whenever I serve, pray, or obey. I can't keep going like this. Does anyone else know a way to cancel one of these before the next box arrives?

I barely have stock options! How am I more liable than any of the C-suite execs? I don't want to be her, she barely had 20 minutes in her day between laundry, chores, and car rides to ride her vibrator. What kind of life is that?

And the next section of her 'How-To' video is about her husband... Just when I thought this couldn't get worse.

They've adopted me and won't let me leave their sight. I don't have a grasp on the language yet, but I think we're traveling to a different camp. I know it's all their superstition, but I do feel weirder every day. But there's no way I, a human, could actually become an orc breeder, right?

Oh gods, I really need to find a scholar at the next town.

Me, at camp, after a few days

I didn't think it was a big deal, after all, how is agreeing to his every demand any different than what I do at work? Turns out, a lot different when you're his wife. Luckily, he really does love her and has been respectful most of the time.

I'd even done a great job at avoiding sex last night, although that required a different kind of job than the one I'm used to giving.

But now, 20 minutes left, before he goes to work, he tells me he wants this and he can tell I've been wanting it too. So I'm here in a position I never thought I'd find myself in- on hands and knees, ass presented to him, praying he pulls out or lasts- but then he says that.

And now? Oh gawd, and now, I just really want to feel him inside me and make him happy!

My jaw dropped as I read the Wikipedia article. I didn't mean to suck that plump woman dry, I was hypnotized! And now, apparently, I'm becoming just like her! And this is only day 1, how are these minor developments? What do they consider major?!

The statistics around Heferitis were starting to make more sense.

That could be you...

I mean, we kissed a little bit, but that was because I was using the same instincts that helped me remember family members and birthdays. And maybe I promised to open the door to talking again, but my aunt doesn't need to know. I'm doing her a favor and if it makes this week any easier, I'll deal with the fallout later.

But I can't let him know, after begging him to do this. Maybe if I avoid touching it, I can quiet those voices telling me to breed. Why do all my stupid plans keep blowing up in my face? Gawd, I'll never be a man again if I keep falling for these traps...

Even if he does get up a little early, so what? We'll all be laughing about it later over margaritas soon enough. And besides, it's not like he's going to get creampied in the next hour and leave us all stuck.

They don't know they're never changing back and going to be spending the rest of their days as horny as bound little mob wives to their men. The 'previous wives' I say they're replacing don't even exist, it's just a way to show the consequences of stepping out of line and getting them to commit to the role.

It's much cleaner than how we used to do it, that's for sure. And at the end of the day, the head of the 5 families are happy. They just want to see these rats get fucked.

I just wish he would treat me like any other bodyguard job and not go all in on this wife thing. All this stress has really messed with my head and with the 5 family summit coming up, I need to focus on not blowing my own cover...

Gawd, did I say hunk? I didn't mean hunk it's just this body... But she won't unwish it and even worse, she thinks I wanted to age up and be her fat aunty. Says it's the domestic life I was looking for. How do I convince her I don't want to be her aunt when every time Daniel touches me, I melt?

I started making little teaching videos, trying to share my own experiences of having my body swapped and stolen, and they actually really took off. I just wanted to help hapless guys like me in bodies they don't understand.

We're not a huge community, I feel like more pervs watch my channel than swap-ees, but it feels good to help and teach. I know that's part of this body's influence, this inner mom, but so what? I am a mom now. I like being a caretaker.

It's always hard when I get people asking how to change back or how to 'stop liking men'. Honestly, if I knew, I wouldn't have a dildo I nicknamed in my bedside drawer. Even worse are friends and people from my old life 'shocked' to see what's happened to me, asking all sorts of nonsense questions like 'how could I let this happen to me'.

Newsflash boyos, I didn't let anything happen. I had to work hard to be this adjusted, faked it til I made it, so to speak.

I'm not an expert, just someone who's learned a thing or two along the way of becoming a normal, average, everyday woman and mom.

Gawd, I need a beer. I can't believe I'm about to be riding bitch for 20 hours to Sturgis to save my manhood. I just hope my best friend was joking about wanting to go full bore into biker culture. Surely his new beard and beer belly have shown him how ridiculous this all is.